ZigZagStraight

Sanctuary for Unwanted Things

2011-08-06T10:52:00.000-07:00

That's what Wylie referred to his room as this week. That Boy! When asked for instances he says: you know, the Bionicles, Transformers, old CDs and stuff like that. Since I have been saturated in fiction this summer, I immediately go for the metaphor. Why do you think your room was chosen as the Sanctuary?

He didn't get a chance to answer because something distracted us in the car and another conversation began. But, I can tell you a bit about sanctuary...

Wylie is the ultimate re-user in the reduce, reuse, recycle mantra. If given the chance to save something or throw it away, he never throws away. Now, in the extreme this is called hoarding I think. But, Wylie doesn't keep trash, etc. Only things of purpose and value. So, his room is a safe spot for unwanted items because Wylie sees value and purpose as unchanging constants. And, not only does he perceive these values as constant, he has catalogued them in his mind and can provide details about the time and place the things were acquired.

All of this could set Wylie up to be an amazing docent or curator. Maybe of his own collection?

The Meaning of Life

2011-05-16T23:35:00.000-07:00

Above the white noise of his HALO REACH game comes the question: "Mom, what is the meaning of Life?"

Keeping with my professional training as a skilled educator--I stall for time.

"What do you think the meaning is?"

Wylie expands his original question: "What I want to know is, why is life so full of happy, good times but then sad and hard times?"

And, that shames me into thinking about this sad, lonely, ZigZagStraight blog....without a good post in almost a year.

The conversation that followed will be the subject of the next new posts!

A Tale of Two Dental Visits

2010-09-14T08:35:00.000-07:00

One of my favorite chapters of ZigZagStraight has to do with Wylie's first dental visit. A couple weeks ago, Wylie and I had dueling dental appointments. Mine--a routine crown replacement--was on Monday, Wylie's was on Tuesday. (I have to shout out, I go to one of the most respected dentists in the Loma Linda & Redlands areas. He is the dentist of dentists. Seriously. I highly recommend him). My dentist drew first: "Hmmm...well, uh...Jill...there's just not enough good tooth left for me to build a crown..." Next came words like "peridontist", "root canal", and then finaly "implant". And, with that last shot, I was down for oral surgery in two days. Until then, a steady diet of nothing--the temporary crown was hanging on through sheer force of my will--and motrin 24 hours a day. (I did receive excellent care under the careful precision of Dr. Zalsman in Redlands). Yes, #19 is no longer. And, in its place some bone from a dearly departed. My titanium root will be installed in a couple months. I am robot.

That was all on the Monday before Wylie's visit the next day to his dentist.

Now, if you didn't link to the previous post part deux of the duel will not really resonate with you, but for those of you who recall...

I pick up Wylie from school and begin the drive to Dr. Jiminez . We had a very positive experience there for the boys' cleanings. Wylie knew about the appointment so there was no surprises here. However, as we drove over anxiety began to leak out of Wylie like Niagra Falls.

"I'm not getting a shot, right?"

"No."

"It's not going to hurt me, right?"

"No."

"They're not going to make me smell anything, right?"

"Um...well, " I had to be honest. The doctor and I had agreed to use nitrous to help Wylie relax for the appointment. This revelation sends Wylie into full-panic mode. Campbell does his best to encourage him. This only increases the water pressure. I keep saying "You'll have to ask Dr. Jiminez, Wylie, do you trust him?" More water.

By the time we got to the office, the falls had dried up and Wylie presented himself stoically. The capable assistant invited "mom" to come back with Wylie, but I deferred to him. He said he was fine with just he and the doctor.

Out in the waiting room, Campbell did his homework sitting in the stump of an old tree and I immersed myself in a short novel under the watchful eyes of forest critters (Dr. Jiminez's office is fashioned after the 100 Acre wood). I tried to avoid all references to time so as to remain calm, cool, collected, detached.

A very short 45 mintues later, the capable assistant comes out with a briefing:

"He did great, Mom. Four fillings done and he did just fine. No tears or resistance. We had The Secret of Nimh playing on the screen and he was completely engrossed. Even told Doctor to move out of the way one time. He didn't want to get up because the movie wasn't over. Just so you know...he did tell us after that it was incredibly painful for him and that he was screaming in his mind." Because the staff had only seen Wylie once before, she didn't know how to take this declaration. I assured her it was quite normal for Wylie and they had succeeded where others had failed.

Soon after, Wylie comes out with a triumphant, yet somewhat nitrous-y grin. He never heard a word the assistant said about the visit. We all walk out to the car.

Campbell asks: "So, Wylie how did you do?"

Wylie: "It was so painful. I was screaming in my mind. But, The Secret of Nimh was on and the doctor couldn't hear it. I can eat in 30 minutes. Can we go to Blockbuster and rent Secret of Nimh and then to McDonalds, Mom? It will be 30 minutes then."

We drove into the sunset. Campbell looked at me through the rearview mirror, shook his head and rolled his eyes. Wylie was lost somewhere between his first and tenth nugget only 29 minutes away. As for me? I shook my head, too, except that made my mouth hurt and reminded me of my impending dental drama. With the entire left side of my bite shut down, 800 mg of motrin coursing through my veins and an empty stomach, I was pretty close to those Niagra Falls myself. But, looking over at my brave son, I decided to smile in my mind instead.

What's in a Name?

2010-09-01T10:02:00.000-07:00

Like this blog name for example?

Power.

There's a lot of zig zag going on at the Harris Ranch right now. Who knew that title would be at once descriptive and prophetic? This is a place-holder entry for future blogs on:

Wylie & I: dueling dental drama
8/10 of a mile
Jehovah Jireh
Band mania

Wait for it!

The New Diary (of a Non-Wimpy Kid)

2010-08-05T10:22:00.000-07:00

We are 11 days out from the adventure of middle school for Wylie and Campbell. Coincidentally, the movie "Diary of A Wimpy Kid" came out on DvD this week. We watched it and it is well-done, laugh-outloud funny.

Not surprisingly, Wylie is a big fan of this author and this series.

I cannot know now if Wylie's experiences in a couple weeks will mirror Greg and Rowley's, but one thing is certain: there will be stuff to write about.

Stay-tuned...

Calling C.S. Lewis

2010-04-08T22:13:00.000-07:00

I profess faith in God and in his son, Jesus. This defines many of the boundaries and templates of my life and my perspective. Having just celebrated Easter--the Super Bowl of Christian tradition some might say--it is especially troubling to me that I am having such a difficult time witnessing the end of my friend's life after a long battle with cancer.

It's difficult for me to even articulate my difficulty.

I don't think it's anger about the injustice of her struggles with a buffet of chemotherapies.

I don't think it's frustration about the cycle of hope and despair I've seen her go through.

I don't think it's sorrow for the days she will not have ahead.

Although all of these things are catalogued in my emotions, these are not the root causes of my own pathos.

I think it's fear.

And, if I am fearful about my friend's transition from this side of eternity to the other side, what does that imply about my own inevitable transition?

C.S. Lewis said, "Has this world been so kind to you that you should leave with regret? There are better things ahead than any we leave behind."

The first time I read those words I believed them, I think.

But, these past two days give me pause.

One good quote deserves another, so here's another:

I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than should be stifled by dry-rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow than a sleepy and permanent planet. The proper function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them. I shall use my time. (Jack London)

I am all for living and not simply prolonging. But, I wonder why I am seemingly unconvinced about the better things ahead just now.

I'm calling C.S. Lewis. I'm using a spiritual shout-out on Christianity Cash-Cab. I don't know the answer and time is running out.

Rest

2010-03-31T22:52:00.000-07:00

Was that for the wicked or the weary?

A group of us are learning about life's healing choices and we read a verse from the bible where Jesus says:

"Come to me, all who are burdened and weary, and you will find rest for your souls."

What does that mean?

What does it mean for my soul to rest? In our culture, we never really rest. How can we rest when we are perpetually reachable via text? How can we rest when multiple tasks are tackled with the greatest of ease through technology? Instead of lightening our load this efficiency in tasking has weighed us down. I don't believe anyone truly rests anymore.

But, maybe that's not the kind of rest Jesus was describing.

When I put my feet up, my body rests temporarily. What do I have to put up for my soul to rest?

One common definition explains that if something rests it's in a position such that its weight is supported. Am I in position such that my soul--the weight of my soul--is supported? As I consider this question, my mind wanders to the image of a mother cradling a baby while it sleeps. We envy this position; we boast sometimes about "sleeping like a baby". Babies sleep quite well nestled against a parents' soft, warm skin where the entire weight of the child is supported by loving, secure arms. How long has it been since my body or soul has known rest like that?

Maybe the question is not what do I have to put up for my soul to rest.

Maybe the question is what do I have to take down?

Jesus said "Come to me."

What is in my way today?

Zzzzzzzzzz

Silence is Golden

2010-02-27T10:22:00.000-08:00

...or at least...bronze-ish.

It is rare (exceedingly so) that I am ever alone in my home. Sometimes I fantasize about it...(cut to: birthday party for 13 "tweens" last weekend), but it's always in an idealized way. If I were "alone" I would (completely renovate the spare bedroom, replant the garden, spring clean those nasty kitchen cupboards, finish the 12 books I've started reading, write a symphony, scrapbook...ha!) If the idealized version is to manifest it requires more planning and preparation.

I found myself alone in my home because:

a) 15 year old is at camp this weekend
b) 45 year old is on the east coast this weekend
c) 12 year old is at auntie's house (last minute invite)
d) 12 year old is at auntie's house (last minute invite)

Here is the list of what I've done so far:

a) watched two mediocre movies
b) consumed 3/4ths of an individual Brando from Gourmet Pizza Shoppe
c) went to bed without brushing my teeth
d) woke up at 9:30 & currently drinking coffee with cinnamon toast

I'm not proud of myself. But, even as I write this long overdue next blog entry, the silence emphasizes what is so true about my life: I covet the quiet but thrive in the noise.

Off to polish the silver...

2010...Where to Begin?

2010-01-02T10:06:00.000-08:00

I'm going to take Vizzini's advice and go back to the beginning...

Among other priority adjustments in the new year, I am committed to reading through the bible this year. Youversion.com (link to the right) has 20 different ways to read through the bible. I've chosen the chronological guide. This will take me through in daily readings roughly the way the events described unfolded in histroy. Exciting.

Truth transforms from the inside out. What better way to begin 2010...transformed every day.

Fellowship of the ....

2009-12-08T16:02:00.000-08:00

Ring. Right.

Wasn't it all about traveling together (even though sometimes the friends were apart on different paths)?

Wasn't it all about being right in the middle of something completely scarey and unpredictable--life-threatening even--and trusting the cause was greater than the sacrifice?

Wasn't it terrible, cold, disappointing, discouraging, a drag, and exhilirating, inspiring, engaging, and perfect all at the same time?

I am aware as I zig and zag on my own adventure that others in my fellowship are enduring something I am not. Even though we are together we may be apart. I am sensing the danger and helpless to prevent it.

Nevertheless, we are pressing on...together...

Surfing

2009-11-13T22:15:00.000-08:00

In a previous chapter of my life when appointments with people populated my planner...I coined a phrase for myself: surfing the chaos.

There seemed to arise every so often--a day, a week, a month--times when the line between peace and panic would fade and catastrophic chaos loomed. During those times, I grabbed my board and caught the wave.

Those on the shore watching the activity were amazed; it looked so smooth and graceful and choreographed on the surface!

"How does she do it"? They would ask outloud to no one in particular.

The answer is: I had no idea. All I knew to do when faced with those circumstances was stay on the board and hang on through the curl of the wave, mist in my face, roar of the ocean, threat of imminent peril crashing overhead.

In the end it was almost always exhilirating. Sometimes it was dibilitating. Fairly often it was excruiating. But, what other choice was there?

I don't know if it's El Nino, the Mayan Calendar, or the Harvest Moon...but, it's been one of those weeks. Midterms, lectures, office hours. Budgets, evals, baby showers. The lines in my forehead and shadows under my eyes give me away: sleep has been sweet but all too short recently.

My life's current chapter has a different theme, but the predictably random nature of the chaos wave has not changed.

Surfs Up!

Grab your board...

Occupational Therapy for All (forthcoming)!

2009-11-02T16:01:00.000-08:00

Hey, ZigZag fans near and far--

I got some good news on Thursday; AOTA (American Occupational Therapy Association) is publishing a collection of stories about therapy...and a submission I sent to them earlier this year will be included in their finished work!

This is exciting on multiplie levels: Wylie's story gets a wider audience, understanding and awareness regarding Asperger-related issues will increase, and the fabric of my writing career has one more thread of credibility stitched into it.

Once the particulars are finalized, I'll be sure to pass along the link and info.

Next writing project: final draft of my GIS/teaching research paper sent off to Journal of Economic Education (before Christmas)!

Thank you to all ZigZag readers for encouraging me to this point.

Later in September

2009-10-27T19:06:00.000-07:00

American Vice: Mapping the 7 Deadly Sins

2009-09-04T09:46:00.001-07:00

American Vice: Mapping the 7 Deadly Sins

Posted using ShareThis

Life Transformation

2009-09-02T11:03:00.001-07:00

Want to fill your bucket? Watch this amazing work by Robbie Carlson capturing real life change here.

Buckets, Brains, and Drains

2009-08-20T12:29:00.000-07:00

My church, the church I also work for part-time, SGCF, sent me to The Leadership Summit for the second time. What a smart investment. It is--without a doubt--the most powerful conference I've attended in the last 10 years. The collaboration of brilliant leaders from within and outside the church domain is unprecedented.

Lots of big brains.

The list goes on and on. All of these hosted by Bill Hybels, one of my mentors in faith.

What a privilege to attend.

Hybels confessed the downturn in the economy has created another full-time job for most leaders: how to navigate through this new reality. And, in his humble way, he also confessed his natural response to all of this was to work harder. In his own words, he said the life he was living was not sustainable. He had to make adjustments.

He drew a bucket on a paper. It's so simple. All of us have a bucket that holds our sense of peace and well-being. When the level is full or nearly so, we can lead, work, love, give and perform at our potential. However, the very act of doing these things drains the bucket. Add to this the people that we all must deal with that also have a "draining" effect on our energy, and you very quickly can begin to see the levels of peace, fullness, satisfaction drain away.

We have to re-fuel. We have to renew. We have to proactively take responsibility for the filling of our own bucket. For those of us who follow after God, this necessarily involves time with Him, with scripture, prayer, and truth. And, of course, it could involve engaging in more of the activities that are energy boosters (exercise, hobbies, time with family, etc.) and adequately monitoring the energy drains.

This is just one simple, but profound "take-away". More to follow; my bucket is spilling over.

All Over the Map

2009-07-09T08:03:00.000-07:00

The next few weeks are "full".

Our WILDlife Family Camp kick-starts Friday up at The Oaks in Lake Hughes, CA

Upon returning home Sunday afternoon, Tim and I take off for San Diego so I can attend my first ever User Conference with ESRI the 12th through the 15th. My presentation slides are here

Got to go to Disneyland for my birthday next week to get my gift card

Campbell has a swim meet in Hemet the following weekend

SGCF has another event planned for 4th-6th graders on the 22nd...it will be "cosmic"

Prep work for a new course (to me) at CSUSB should begin later this month: Econ 335 "Tools of Economic Analysis". I'll be teaching one of my favs as well "Economics of Sport"

Anticipating some new contacts after my GIS presentation which will hopefully lead to some more productive research in this area and a finalized paper submission before school begins

That's just a snapshot. I know your summer is full of jam-packed-action, too. It's a good thing we're all on vacation???

Finish Well

2009-07-07T14:44:00.000-07:00

One of the lessons (if not the most important one) I'm learning from the death of my father-in-law is the importance of finishing well. Those who knew Bud well were not blind to the obvious blunders and areas in his life where he had fallen short and missed the mark. But, many--far more--beheld a man pressing forward, forgetting what was behind, reaching out for the prize--the upward call of Christ. This was captured poignantly by the dark-haired 6th grade boy who got up to speak at Bud's memorial. Trembling and scared, this little man expressed beautifully the importance Bud's example. He spoke of Mr. Ray's ability to tell the stories of the bible well. In particular, he recalled the story of Easter. Because of Bud's passion for Christ and his commitment to teaching Sunday School week after week, this boy came to Christ and has unlimited potential in the kingdom of God. His testimony obliterates any notion that somehow there is a scale of justice where our sins, our mistakes, the trash of our lives (of Bud's life), are somehow weighed against the trivial "good" things we think we do. If there is such a scale, no one "not even one" would prove righteous. Instead, this boy's testimony reveals what it means--for any of us who call ourselves Christians--to be redeemed. Only Christ can take the trash, the blunders, the mistakes, the missed marks and transform them into something...wonderful. Something purposeful. Something eternal. The sooner we grasp this lesson, the sooner we can all get on with finishing well.
Philippians 3:13

Perspectives

2009-06-26T10:07:00.000-07:00

Success.

Fulfillment.

Ambition.

Dreams.

Words we attach particular meaning to.

Each requires perspective.

Yesterday, on the way to swim practice with the boys, the merits of swimming and practicing more during the summer were being discussed. The main idea being: the more you swim, the better you swim. The boys, however, being 11 years old and inclined to just a bit of summer-time laziness took issue with the main idea. Using their keen logical minds one of them said:

"so, if I swim four days a week I'll be as good as Michael Phelps?"

I replied with something equally logical but parental:

"Not every great swimmer is an Olympian like Michael Phelps. There are far more great swimmers than there are Olympic swimmers".

We went back and forth. Finally, we did agree if you want to be a better swimmer it will most likely involve more swim practice. And, four or five more years of swim practice would make them both better swimmers.

Since Campbell just posted some much improved times at his last meet, it must have inspired Wylie to prophesy the following:

"Well, in five years Campbell can be an Olympican (pronounced o-limp-i-can) and I can be working at McDonalds with my best friend, Thomas".

Success.

Fulfillment.

Dreams.

Ambition.

Words we attach a particular meaning to....

Perspectives.

Every Mile a Smile?

2009-06-02T01:12:00.000-07:00

(This is a finisher's story I wrote for the San Diego Rock N Roll Marathon website--)

This was my first marathon. Just before entering Hwy. 163, I thought it might be my last. I've been training for about six months--following a modified schedule I found in John Bingham's book "Marathoning for Mortals". A life-long recreational jogger, I truly embraced the challenge of the longer runs and found the training was becoming satisfying on its own. The race was the catalyst that got me on the running journey.

Although I was not running for a specific cause, I picked up an idea from an article about former Presidential Candidate, Mike Huckabee. He completed several marathons by dedicating every mile to a special person. I adopted this into a personal theme "every mile is a smile". and even laminated a card with the names of my special people. In this way, the race became more than just a personal quest, it had taken on a life of its own and all the people who knew about it in my life were becoming invested with me.

About a month ago, after an 18 miler, I injured my i.t. band. I did everything I read about to treat it, resting as much as possible while still trying to train. In spite of all the rest, icing, elevation, stretching and focus on form, I was persistently having trouble with my left leg after long runs.

Consequently, I showed up at the starting line in San Diego knowing there was a strong possibility the left band could flare again. I began the race conservatively, certainly working on a negative split (about 13:20 overall pace). Just before we left the city-streets to enter 163, the i.t. band started "barking". Another mile or so and it was obviously not going to subside.
I was faced with a decision right then and there in the middle of that highway: 1) quit or 2) press on and see if I could finish. I found that if I changed up my run/walk breaks, I actually could make steady progress for stretches of time with pain below my "threshold". I adapted my race-day strategy from "work on a negative split" to "work on putting one foot in front of the other".

Obviously, I lagged behind the pace group I had optimistically hoped to follow. Still, after about 16 miles it became obvious to me that I was in no danger of missing the time cut-offs, so all was not lost.

By mile 21 I knew I was going to finish no matter what. My left leg was stiffening and my right foot was suffering from the unplanned additional walking, but for me that mile marker was a true point of no return. (Strangely enough, the laminated card with my special names/miles got lost when I grabbed my last gel pack! But, I knew who the last miles were for and that strengthened my resolve to leave nothing on reserve). I was all in.

Mile 25 to the finish I'll never forget. I saw people struggling to stay upright. I saw a lady just ahead of me who had to be in her 80s going strong and at the same time I saw a young college kid drop to the curb on my left. This last mile was no respecter of persons. When I felt the stabbing pain in my left knee more severely than any other time on the course I said outloud to no one in particular and to God: "Please, I just want to finish strong". And, right then a marine at the entrance to the depot looked me in the eye and said "you're going to make it, runner".
A half-a-mile more and I saw my husband, kids, and friends waving to me and shouting out in pride. Through the tunnel on the other side I saw the Rock n Roll logo and I swear the pain went away for the last few steps across the finish line.

One day later, I'm icing my knee and wincing through stretches. I've got a blister under my toenail, and all across the back of my right heel from the adapted walk/run technique I defaulted to on mile 10. I know I'll have to figure out a better way to run to avoid the i.t. band problem. There's work I'll have to do to fully recover.

However, Bingham wrote in his book that somewhere on the course what you believe about yourself will equal what is true about yourself. Somewhere around mile 10 I decided to keep going even though it hurt; at mile 21 I believed I would finish. At mile 26.2 I experienced the truth.

It was all worth it.

Living Museum Comes Alive!

2009-05-26T09:47:00.001-07:00

Here's just a few shots from the Living Museum at Calimesa Elementary School May 21, 2009!

General George S. Patton gives a briefing to his Grammy SB and father, Lt. Col. Tim Harris

Davy Crockett: ready to secure life, liberty, and property!

Clara Barton (Miranda) has been a classmate of Wylie's since the 3rd grade. She is precious! So smart and stands maybe 4 foot 6inches tall.

Davy and Dad strike a pose. Grammy in the background! What an awesome day for the 5th graders!

Living Museum Updates

2009-05-07T23:05:00.000-07:00

The boys have been hard at work on their display boards and "dolls" for the Living Museum later this month:

The actual Living Museum Tours are Thursday, May 31st 9:30 to 11:30 at Calimesa Elementary School. I guarantee you it will be a good time!

Mother May I?

2009-05-06T13:31:00.000-07:00

For many reasons, this month of May is extreme for me.

Two courses at CSU are underway and three courses at U of R have begun. For college professor types, this number of courses would be commonly called an "overload".

M-W-F mornings I'm on campus at CSU; every other Monday night and every Tuesday and Thursday night for the next six weeks I am on campus at U of R.

Combine that with my part-time work for SGCF, being a wife/mom, wannabe marathoner and you get an extreme month.

I knew it would be like this. But, knowing it would be and being in it are two different things.

This Sunday is Mother's Day...

If you were playing the childhood game...what would you ask?

Right now, I'd ask for the little charm Hermoine had in Harry Potter where she could go back and forth in time....

Mother May I?

Courage

2009-04-28T00:23:00.000-07:00

One of the fun things I get to do (occasionally) at my church is teach! Last Sunday my message was "Esther: Courage". Here's the link if you want to listen in....

The Living Museum

2009-04-16T10:58:00.001-07:00

The boys are in classes with teachers who team teach science and social studies. This works nicely for a mom of twins: at least there are not twice the assignments! Coming up in the next month is a social studies assignment called "The Living Museum" where the boys will select a person to "play", research them, put together a display board and then "become" this person for the museum.

This is right up both Campbell and Wylie's alley...

These are the two personalities the boys have chosen:

General George S. Patton

and...

that would be Davie Crockett.

So, test your knowledge of Cam and Wise....

which one picked which man?

We will post the progress of their research as the assignment unfolds...

Two for the Road

2009-04-08T15:45:00.000-07:00

Some are inspired to clean during this season. Others to fall in love.

Not I.

I was inspired to facilitate the mastery of that all-important life skill: riding a bicycle.

Ladies and Gentlemen...I give you....

Two for the Road

Spring Breakers

2009-04-05T19:27:00.000-07:00

The Harris kids are on spring break!

So far they have:

swam in the pool at the Mission Inn
taken Tim's "unofficial" tour of the Mission Inn
sat in President Taft's chair (all three of them at the same time)
hiked to the top of Mt. Rubidoux
visited the Riverside Natural History Museum
sat in our hot tub
watched Monsters v. Aliens
played catch
played basketball
hunted for bugs
found bugs
lost bugs
watched movies
played video games

Week #2 begins tomorrow...

Diary of...a not-so-whimpy-Kid

2009-03-25T09:31:00.001-07:00

There is a book series out for elementary kids called Diary of a Whimpy Kid that is cute and very readable. Wylie has been engrossed and was close to finishing it yesterday. This birthed the following exchange:

Wylie: "Mom, I want to do a scrapbook of my life--you know--with pictures and stuff".

Me: "Ok, I have a scrapbook upstairs--I think--that you can use". I replied to him as I was tidying up dishes in the kitchen and getting ready to sit down for the first time on Tuesday to relax a little.

Wylie: "Can you get it now?"

I realized, resistence was futile.

A reformed Creative Memories addict, of course I had scrapbooks upstairs he could use (along with 100s of dollars of other scrapbooking "stuff" that I had to have and haven't used in over 3 years....) Finally, I found a scrapbook I purchased for the boys hoping one day they might want to make their own book. See? How prophetic I was???

Once I got out the materials and supplies, Wylie began his "diary" in earnest. He worked on layouts, cutting pictures, writing narratives, drawing pictures, recalling trips, holidays, school mates....he was "focused". I had to cut him off at 9:30!

Here's five things I love about this recent development:

Wylie was inspired by something he read

Wylie wanted to create something using his own imagination and ability

Wylie drew pictures and wrote sentences for something other than required homework assignments

Wylie used scissors (a hat tip to his years of Occupational Therapy) without complaining

Wylie did not play a video game or watch a show on Tuesday after swim--he literally, read a book, listened to music, and "scrapped" until bedtime....

Ladies and Gentlemen....it's the dawn of a new CTI era....

Stay tuned (and pass those die-cuts over here.....)

No Cowboy UP!

2009-03-13T10:05:00.001-07:00

So, this very cool cowboy/rodeo champion, Ty Murray, is on Dancing With the Stars this season (although, it has to be said...not for long....). During his introductory video history it showed him riding bulls and all the other stuff rodeo dudes do. Wylie has seen his share of rodeo dudes bite it on "Destroyed in Seconds" and other such shows on Discovery channel.

This morning, on the way to school, I asked Wylie if he thought he might want to ride in a rodeo someday....

"Not me! Those guys get smashed by bulls and need a lot of surgeries for like....spine removal, brain-mushing, and amnesia".

I'll take that as a no. Especially the spine removal part...

Scarecrow? Lion? Tin-Man?

2009-03-10T16:33:00.000-07:00

Wylie is smitten with our "Wicked" soundtrack. Today he asked (on our way home from school where most interesting questions arise) which character would you be in The Wizard of Oz and/or Wicked?

I think it's a great question.

Wylie says he would for sure be the Tin-Man (a.k.a. Bach in Wicked).

So, which character would you be???

Except for the Nose Thing

2009-03-09T22:22:00.000-07:00

Wylie put in a purchase-order request for "Pinochio"...the latest edition of this timeless tale from Disney. In justifying his request he said, unequivocally, "I'm just like him; well, except for the nose thing".

How can I refuse a real boy?

In other Harris kid news...

Campbell had the best swim meet of his young life! He posted improved times in all events and even took first in two heats. He earned some solid points toward his trophy. Wylie gave his all on the breast and free. Though he was DQed on the breast for a late second hand touch (you've got to touch the wall with two hands simultaneously), he took the criticism with respect and announced afterwards "what do you expect--it's Redlands, I always get DQed at Redlands".

Mortal Marathon Training Update: finished a 10 mile run last Saturday at Hangar 24 (my husband is a fan) and felt great throughout. Even tried a chocolate gel pack for my nutrition! This weekend it is a 12 mile run...where will I go? What will I see?

More later this week...

Quotable Wylie

2009-02-24T00:41:00.000-08:00

2009 sees me trying to be a good example for my children ( in earnest) with respect to overall health--in particular nutrition and exercise. It's no secret I am training for the San Diego Rock n Roll marathon in May; it's also no secret I am a recovering Diet Dr. Pepper addict. At my worst, I probably was five or six cans a day. And, it wasn't just diet stuff in the house. I'd have real Coke sometimes, too. So, the kids (and especially Wylie) had access to soda more than was probably optimal.

I gave it up in January.

I'm not completely caffeine free (I will take a drag off a coke or coffee occasionally and buy one when out for a meal), but I have ceased buying diet sodafor myself or any soda with caffiene for the house. Only 7 UP and root beer for Campbell.

This met with some unhappy protests, but has basically been adapted to by everyone at the Harris Ranch.

Today, though, here comes Wylie:

"Boy, this living without caffeine stuff is really driving me crazy".

My (now) 11 year old boy is coping with his withdrawls just fine. I'll continue to update on our quest for the best in 2009....stay tuned!

He Said He Said

2009-02-10T20:22:00.000-08:00

Everyone in the Yucaipa Valley experienced the fairly extreme weather on Monday. Today's clear skies were a sharp contrast to yesterday's damp, grey, wet, winter, rain-sleet-snow-mix. The differences were not lost on both my sons.

We did not swim yesterday due to the weather. With all the combined family activities last week, the boys were only at the pool one afternoon (as opposed to 3 workouts generally).

Today, we were on our way up to the pool. I'll leave it to you to figure out which he said what en route:
He said: "Boy, I hope we do breast stroke today".

The other he said: "Boy, I hope I don't freeze my butt off today".

I laughed all the way up the hill...

Rain Running

2009-02-09T11:33:00.000-08:00

Southern Californians are generally ill-prepared for inclement weather of any kind. Take rain for example...

This weekend, I drove down to San Diego with some of our brilliant team from SGCF to attend a Children's Ministry Conference. It had been raining off-an-on the day we went down. We counted six accidents on the 15 South. Then, on the way home, two more accidents.

I have a cautious streak that's pretty wide, so I slow down in the rain. And, I'm not inclined to run in the serious rain. 1) I don't have sufficient rain gear and 2) I really don't want to slip, fall, pull something, twist something or otherwise injure myself.

So, today I ran on the treadmill at Reps For Life (a local gym I joined in January to help compliment my marathon training). My workout assignment was just 45 minutes of running at about 60% of my maximum heart rate. In other words, an easy run where I could "theoretically" hold a conversation.

This "rain running" caused me to think about a few things...

1) since I was in control of the incline and speed on the treadmill, I had a sense of command over my environment and my body--that was cool for the first 15 minutes, and very boring for the last 30 minutes

2) even though I was running a good pace for me, the extremely fit gal 4 treadmills over was totally going for some kind of record and I couldn't help but occasionally see her in my peripheral vision and get that jealousy vibe

3) just when I imagined I was finishing mile 26 in my race and the endorphins were pumping and Paul Coleman Trio was singing me to victory...I hit my ear-buds with my hand and dropped my entire ipod on the floor which resulted in me having to do the "straddle" on the machine--it completely broke my rhythm and gave gold-medal gal a big advantage

4) all-in-all, I prefer running outside. I think we are made to enjoy a little bit of uncertainty, to travel while we exert ourselves (versus "standing still" on the mill), to feel the wind in your face and wonder whether you can make it home instead of plodding along...knowing you can hit the stop button anytime

Rain, rain...go away.

Evidence of Excellence-part 2

2009-02-03T22:14:00.000-08:00

Evidence of Excellence

2009-02-03T22:10:00.001-08:00

My daughter has skills:

This is just one illustration she has done for an honors english project. It's a short story about an 30 gig ipod that reads people's thoughts...very entertaining.

You read it here first.

Some Super Bowl Fun Without the Game

2009-02-01T18:41:00.000-08:00

Thanks to a tweet friend, you can watch the commercials here without wading through the entire game! Pretty cool. Let me know what your favorite was by commenting on this post! Go Steelers ( I guess....not really a fan but The Brownings would never forgive me if I didn't give them some love today).

A Bug's Life

2009-01-31T20:00:00.000-08:00

Some time last summer, Wylie got a Bug "geo-dome" (for lack of a better word). He took it to a swim meet and it was a huge hit with kids of all ages. They found several bugs that day that got a one-way ticket to indoor-living.

After that time, Wylie set his mind on the Bug Vaccum: a device that allows one to suck up bugs to more easily relocate them in the geo-dome. So, this has been six months or more of longing after this device.

Today, the search ended. We have the bug-sucker! Alas, we got home just after sunset so Wylie did not have sufficient time to vacuum the backyard. Still, he's already got 3 little critters from right inside Harris ranch. Kind of creepy--if you think about it.

I suspect tomorrow, after church, there will be quite a bit of bug-sucking going on. The prospects of populating the insect geo-dome makes me more than a little nervous. Perhaps I will double-check the seals on those plastic domes. With Tim on an extended trip, the scenario could rapidly degrade from the cute "A Bug's Life" to the more sinister "How the Bugs Bit My Wife"...

Moms and Their Pinky-Swears

2009-01-27T19:47:00.001-08:00

"Did you talk to Ms. Peterson about your math problems"?

"No. I forgot".

"Wylie! We pinky-swore this morning you would talk to Ms. Peterson for extra help".

"I know. I told you I forgot".

(Insert 5 minutes speech about accountability, doing our best, asking for help, complete with reminders about how Ms. Peterson loves when he asks for help and goes back to the desk for practice, etc., etc., etc.).

Campbell chimes in: didn't you have more testing with Mrs. Ferguson today, Wylie?

Yes.

"So, you were out of class today with more testing? Why didn't you say so, I'm sorry I over-reacted".

Wylie mutters under-his-breath:

"Moms and their Pinky-Swears..."

(Somehow I picture this post as a comic strip....I swear).

Misadventures of the Mortal Marathoner-part 1

2009-01-23T16:18:00.001-08:00

I have decided to run in the San Diego RocknRoll Marathon in May.

With this decision comes a commitment to run/train differently than I ever have in my life.

I actually like discipline/structure/schedules etc in this area, so that part is not hard for me to adopt. Typically, my runs are fairly predictable, smooth, and invigorating affairs.

Today, though, tested my nerve.

Today was rainy. No matter, I have suitable attire to run in the rain and not get too wet/hot. I bundled up had my gear all stowed (ipod, water bottle in fanny pack, gum, etc). I started out on my 6 mile quest.

Mile marker < 1: rock in right shoe.
This generally is a non-issue if the pebble is small. Small pebbles move around and sometimes exit your shoe just like they enter it. I wait a few more steps thinking I can handle it. No. Had to stop, take off shoe, find rock, put shoe back on, get laces right. Continue running.

Mile marker 1.5: burping my tiny breakfast ( I usually don't eat before running, but the new schedule suggests I practice since you must eat before a full-marathon).

Mile marker 2: practice drinking water on-the-fly every 15 minutes. Goes pretty well.

Mile marker 2.5: big truck blows past me knocks off my hat.

Mile marker 3: take another swig of water successfully. Feeling like real athlete now.

Mile marker 4: due for another drink of water I reach back for my cool water bottle out of my pack...it's gone!

Mile marker 4.1: I say outloud to no one "CRAP--RATFARTS" and think to myself ...do I go back and look for it? when did I lose it? Now, I don't have water for the last half of my run...decide to cut losses and keep running.

Mile marker 4.5: rock in my other shoe--no kidding! This one takes not just one stop, but two as the first fix had my shoe lace way too tight and your feet swell while running so there's no way and I have to stop again and fix it.

Mile marker 5: rain gets harder/wetter. I decide to peel off up 10th street and cut my last mile which is a bummer, because in spite of everything, I was feeling like I could go another mile or two!

It was a Murphy's Law run.

Epilogue: once I got home and stretched, etc. ...I did hop in my truck and re-trace my route looking for my silly water bottle. I mean it was only used 3 times and it is custom-designed to fit in my custom little pack and the thought of my little water bottle out on the road, cold and alone...it was too much for me to bear!

I found it; right across from the smog station on the Blvd and Sand Canyon for you Yucaipans.

No doubt there will be other misadventures. I'm glad I've already decided on my marathon mantra: every mile is a smile.

Today, though, it was more like "every mile is a trial".

There's some kind of metaphor for living in this post....

A Path With a View

2009-01-19T20:10:00.000-08:00

I know it's usually a room with a view...

But, today on my little hike behind our neighborhood I discovered a view on the trail I had never fully appreciated before. It was magnificent. The peak on the trail positions you perfectly to overlook the lower end of the Yucaipa Valley. The Crafton Hills are on the north side of the trail and are so close at that point you can quite literally touch them. To the southeast, the flat mesas of the hills bordering Riverside County are lush green. The tall grass on those mesas is juxtaposed against a pristine blue sky with fluffly-white-cotton-candy-clouds. In a word it was: breathtaking.

I stopped and took a mental picture of that view. I want to remember it and be able to see it perpetually in my mind's eye. For a few moments I breathed in all that beauty and exhaled gratitude. Suddenly, I had twice the stamina and energy for the rest of my hike. Twice the mental activity and creativity to complete the paper I'm working on. An improved attitude, state-of-mind, sense-of-peace. And, all of this a full 20 hours before Obama is sworn in tomorrow...

Everyone needs to find a path with a view.

I can't wait to take Wylie, Cam, Ken and Tim up there!

Homework

2009-01-15T07:37:00.000-08:00

Wylie's 3 year IEP (Individualized Education Plan) is coming up in early March. His teachers, his speech pathologist, the Occupational Therapists, the school psychologist, and I all have some homework to do in preparation for this meeting.

I mentioned some time ago in this blog that Wylie had a pending appointment with the neruologist at Loma Linda. We had that appointment in early December and I haven't written about it. Suffice it to say, the doctor officially diagnosed Wylie with an "autistic spectrum" disorder. What this means is simple: he can continue to receive services through the public school system now.

It's all about labels and categories. Up to this point, Wylie qualified for services under speech and language pathology. This is because, 7 years ago, Wylie's biggest challenge was in social communication. At that time, I completed a homework study on him and the county psychologist did an in-home and school site visit, etc. All of this resulted in his move into a special day class and the beginning of all the support services he receives.

The really cool thing is...he has progressed so well that he would no longer qualify for services on speech anymore. So, there had to be a diagnosis. Thus, the visit to neurology in December and the new round of homework.

I'm impressed with the team assembled for this IEP. I trust we will arrive at a plan that is best for Wylie. They always ask (at the end of an IEP) the parent "What are your goals for your child".

I always answer: "To see him reach his potential".

And, that's why I'll be completing my homework this weekend.

Fathers and Sons

2009-01-12T09:21:00.000-08:00

I have been reading a book called "Why Men Hate Going to Church". It's very good. The church I work for strives to be a man-friendly place--which is to say--not too feminine, not too safe, too soft, or too touchy-feely. We have work to do on this, but it is one of our specific goals.

At any rate, one of the things the book mentions is that boys follow men, not religion. And, I believe this is true. It's one of the reasons single-parent homes struggle with leadership issues when it comes to raising teenage boys. And, it's one of the reasons I am very committed to attracting men to our Treasure Island Kids experience...I want the boys to have men to follow. This is not sexist. This is not "old-school". This is just social anthropology.

As an example, last night I encouraged Wylie to pick up a book we bought about a boy named Avi and the battle between the Merrimac and Monitor during the civil war. Now, I got this book (and I do have quite a bit of the male-warrior spirit in me), but my suggestion last night that he start reading it was not what ultimately got him to begin doing so.

It was his father's interest.

Tim is a manly man. He's a pilot. He is an athlete. He is big and strong (and handsome!). And, he maintains an interest in a lot of very cool stuff. One of the things he was interested in as a boy was the Monitor and and the Merrimac. So, Tim starts talking about the subject....

Wylie is all in. He conquered five chapters of the book in one sitting because his dad engaged him on the subject.

Boys follow men.

It stands to reason if we want our sons (or any boys) to follow after a particular set of ideals, philosophies, or beliefs, we better find some men who cling to those and encourage our boys to follow them.

Wylie Harris: Brownbeard!

2009-01-08T17:51:00.000-08:00

Hot of the Press:

Wylie has been cast as "Brownbeard" in the upcoming theatrical debut of "Pirates: The Musical" at Calimesa Elementary this spring.

He is very proud and excited. He had to memorize a short poem (along with all the other students in chorus) to audition for a role. Mrs. Thatcher did not know what to expect--she has Wylie for Social Studies and is familiar with some of his issues. But, he wanted to audition and so she included him.

That particular day, after the try-outs, she came to me personally and said, "You would have been so proud...Wylie was the loudest and clearest of all the kids and he knew the whole poem"! In short, he surprised everyone. And, he has the part he wanted.

This will undoubtedly be a very entertaining chapter of the zigzag chronicles.

Stay tuned...

Arghhhhhhh!

Expecting the Unexpected

2009-01-07T08:52:00.001-08:00

A less-demanding teaching schedule this term has opened up more time for me to breathe. Silly me: I thought that would result in breathing more. But, so far, the last few weeks have been an exercise in something I used to call "surfing the chaos" but shall be called "expecting the unexpected" in this post.

I'm not complaining. Just relaying the facts of the matter. We had the flood (I have contractors in my house this morning as I write working on drywall repair, etc), the normal rush of Christmas and Ken's birthday details, my truck battery died the day we were to go to see Wicked, the first few days of 2009 had me down-for-the-count with a nasty flu-bug. So, it is with expecting the unexpected. Everyday is....an adventure!

What will it be today?

I suppose one of the reasons I truly enjoy my children is they are more accustomed to living this way. There is nothing truly expected about their lives really. They are more open to chaos, change (except for Wylie), adventure, mishaps, scrapes, bumps, bruises, then we are. Well, then I am.

I used to be a kid (didn't you?) so when did we cross over the imaginary line and come to expect that life would be predictable, safe, well-planned-out, and somehow under our control? Maybe you don't have these expectations. Maybe I am the only one holding onto to some form of this delusion and that's why I am learning this lesson (again).

The New Year is a time for planning and mapping out your days. I confess: I love this. I always have. Visual reminders and calendars are important to me because I feel deeply committed to making the most of my time. There is a biblical precedent for this. However, we all know it can be taken to the extreme.

This year may well be the one where I make my plans, but fold them up like a map and tuck them in my Indiana Jones fedora. Instead of consulting my to do list, I may just get up crack my whip every morning.

What will it be today?

There's no way to know for sure, but whatever it is...I won't be expecting it!

The Up-side of Being Down

2009-01-05T09:15:00.000-08:00

Today, I feel human again.

I walked downstairs to say good-bye to the boys as Tim took them to school and Wylie said to me:

"Mom, where have you been? I haven't seen you for a whole day!"

Beginning at 2:30am Saturday morning--I did not feel anything remotely close to human. Some kind of germ got a hold of me and was unmerciful in its complete and total control of my body. I will not go into details, but there are a few more foods going on my "never again" list.

During the worst of those hours, one single, dominant thought became my prayer: normal. I just want to feel normal!

I am closer to normal today; I am so profoundly grateful. If I had not just fought the flu-devil and won, I would probably not have this profound sense of gratitude washing over me.

I guess that's the Up-side of being down.

I missed a day of work at Solid Ground. And, I was really looking forward to leading worship.

I heard my band-mates did fine.

I missed connecting with all the kids in Treasure Island.

I missed hearing stories, exchanging smiles, offering encouragement, praying together, taking communion, and expecting God's next best thing...

I don't think anyone enjoys being sick; but, it has to be said: once you are down for a bit, there really is nothing like normal!

My New Year Theme (In Others' Words)

2009-01-01T13:48:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!

See how many of the following quotes you can identify (speaker and/or movie/book)... I will have a Barnes & Noble gift card (or itunes or Starbucks) for the reader who scores the best!

It's time to take it to the next level...

It's time to try defying gravity (see last post)...

We are men of action; lies do not become us...

I am no man...

As One! As One!

How wonderful life is...now you're in the world...

An invasion of armies can be resisted, but not an idea whose time has come...

The heights by great men reached and kept were not obtained by sudden flight, but they, while their companions slept, were toiling upward in the night...

Only a life lived for others is worth living...

Our chief want is someone who will inspire us to be what we know we could be...

Interesting reaction...but, what does it mean?

Suddenly, the world seems such a perfect place...suddenly it moves with such perfect grace...suddenly my life doesn't seem such a waste...it all revolves around You...

It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities...

We should pray...

Something Wicked?

2008-12-30T16:46:00.000-08:00

McKenna and I enjoyed one of the final LA performances of "Wicked" last night at the Pantages Theatre. What a treat! I'd heard some of the music and a lot of buzz about the production. It is nothing short of phenomenal--and, we had the extra-pleasure of listening to two of the original LA cast members: Eden Espinosa and Megan Hilty. The music and lyrics are magical, but these two young women prove that often there is nothing more electric than the human voice.

Am I gushing? Yes!

To say that McKenna was thrilled is an understatement. And, I was swept away for two hours into the Emerald City.

All this to say...

Could the artists and singers and writers and actors who are Christ-followers create something as powerful if they drew on the rich, colorful, chaotic, and sometimes dark cast of characters that roam throughout the Old and New Testaments? I mean...why not? These stories are engaging, full of danger, love, life, birth, death, battles between good and evil, sisters, brothers, husbands, wives, lovers, they reveal eternal themes and are truly at the heart of many modern "successful" stories, plays, musicals, and movies.

Why not?

But, let's be clear: it would have to be quality. Quality means money. Money means (generally) involving Hollywood-types with no interest in spreading the gospel. Surely, though, there would be a way to infiltrate this world and have a hand at creating some of the culture we enjoy.

Am I dreaming? Yes!

However, I am persuaded by the words of Elphaba (the Wicked Witch) herself:

I'm through accepting limits
'cuz someone says they're so
some things I cannot change
but till I try, I'll never know....

So, if you care to find me
Look to the western sky
As someone told me lately
"everyone deserves the chance to fly"
And If I'm flying solo
At least I'm flying free
To those who'd ground me
Take a message back from me:

Tell them how I
Am defying gravity
I'm flying high
defying gravity

Big Year

2008-12-22T11:54:00.000-08:00

Amidst market crashes and housing bubbles one child had a very big year:

Wylie Barnes Harris.

From his summer camp experiences (culminating in the zipline), his triumphant audition for a speaking part in this year's class musical, to most recently--agreeing to ride the California Screamin' roller coaster on our annual vacation trip--2008 will be remembered as a one big reality tv show for Wylie loosely patterned after "Fear Factor".

Tim, McKenna, Campbell and I have been jaw-dropped. If you had bet us a couple years ago he would have accomplished the list above, none of us would have taken the bet.

So, what changed? What clicked? What continues to prompt a child with extreme sensitivities and challenges to grow past his fears? I wish we could test what it is...I wish we could bottle it and give it away to other people in fear.

Maybe, it's been those prayers at night: "make us brave".

Maybe, it's unconditional love.

Maybe, it's imagination.

Maybe, it's positive "modelling".

Maybe, it's just growing up.

Maybe, it's just the beginning of many more amazing years watching Wylie zigzag toward his potential.

Traditions

2008-12-13T16:46:00.000-08:00

December is full of traditions.

The Harris kids walked Yucaipa Blvd with the Yucaipa Swim Team in the Yucaipa Christmas Parade for the 4th year in a row. It was chilly and grey for the 2nd year in a row. Since Wylie was awarded the Sportsmanship award earlier this year, he had the privilege of actually riding in the uncovered-covered wagon float. This is a privilege he has been waiting for a while.

Another tradition with the Harris Ranch is a periodic flooding of some portion of the houses we've owned. This year's flood is our downstair's bathroom wall and my office. In addition to drying out the wet stuff, the leak had been small enough and gone undetected long enough to birth the dreaded four letter word of flooding: m-o-l-d. So, the bath is now "quarantined" and the downstairs looks like something out of "E.T." after they discover him wandering around outside. As I blog, industrial fans and humidifiers create a blanket of white noise around my head. And, since this was finals week for CSUSB and University of Redlands and I was grading into the wee hours of the morning and I had stacks of papers and case studies all around my office floor the night the water finally broke...well, you can do the math.

Ho! Ho! Ho!

My CSU students were great about things. In fact, they presented me with a Christmas gift. I've never had a class (in all my years of teaching college students) give me a gift. A lone student here or there, but never the full cohort. What was particularly touching was the gift sack: they all signed it with very sweet words. And, they decorated it with econ-meaningful pictures and sayings.

Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la, la, la!

Anyone who was at Solid Ground a couple weeks ago when I spoke can appreciate the humor and irony of the current state of our home/my office. Life is particularly good; we are particularly blessed; Christmas is just around the corner; I've never been in love with God more than just now in this moment.

Glo-o-o-o-o-ria-in-excelsis-Deo!

Signs of the Season

2008-12-04T22:19:00.000-08:00

Is it just me, or do you think this Christmas season is going to be a bit more Capra-esque than most in recent memory? I could swear that more of my neighbors have their lights up and got them up just after Thanksgiving. Is it because everyone feels it? This Christmas begs for more light than seasons past just to balance the darkness that has been fouling everyone's mood since September.

Daily experiences are more bittersweet it seems. Take today for example. Our friend, Kindra Crandell, gave birth to her second child--a son named Gideon. She and Steve and little Esther are so stoked! We all are rejoicing with them. There's the sweet!

This afternoon, however, a tractor-trailer pulled away from my neighbor's former home holding just want they wanted to take with them. They left so much behind. The house is a vacant shell--lifeless and cold without a family in it. And, it will be months before another family brings life and warmth back. There's the bitter.

My own children are making their lists and checking them twice. Our stockings are out and will soon be hung with care. But, Santa has to do more with less this year. We all know he can, but it's a subtle reminder that wealth--like beauty--can be fleeting. I suspect simple gifts will be exchanged at gatherings and we'll all be more grateful than usual for the gestures.

What I loved most about "It's a Wonderful Life" was the way the ordinary people made the miracle happen in the end. To be sure, Clarence earns his wings, but the miracle happens when the neighbors, friends, customers, and family members show up for George. When the realization overcomes him--when he truly understands that all is not lost, that there is still hope--his eyes dance with gratitude and joy. It is a priceless moment. What I am feeling, and imagining is that we all will have the chance to be a miracle for someone this Christmas. Showing up for someone could turn the bitter--sweet. Exchange hope for despair. Let's be brave and show up. (By the same token, if you feel more like George this year, maybe a miracle is just around the corner for you, too).

The Great Race

2008-11-27T10:43:00.000-08:00

This morning Wylie ran 4.5 miles.

That may not sound like a lot to many of you.

But, considering he's never run more than 1 mile, it's pretty impressive.

Wylie began talking about a Thanksgiving Day race two months ago. He conceived of the race as starting at City Hall in Yucaipa and ending "at the outskirts of town" at the Starbucks by the freeway. That way, I could have a cappucino at the end of our race. (His idea).

Now, I'm certain Wylie's vision included throngs of people lining Yucaipa Blvd from start to finish cheering us on, handing us cold water, waving banners of victory and shouting out encouragement. So, when we got out of the car at city hall and the cool air and damp gray clouds hung low in the sky and there was nobody lining the streets except a couple stray dogs and a homeless guy...well....anybody's excitement might have waned.

Thankfully, we had persuaded Papa Gene to run with us. So, the race began a little after 8 am this morning.

We had just made it to McDonald's when I hear Wylie mutter under his breath from behind me "Geez: this is harder than I thought".

We had just passed our turn off at 10 th street when I heard

"Mom! Papa Gene is going too fast!"

By the time we were abeam the highschool, Wylie was imploring us to walk because his legs were hurting.

Just past Sand Canyon, he had to take his hoodie off.

Once we got behind the blvd after it curves slightly south (we took the safer route right along the Crafton Hills), Wylie was hurting.

"Mom, can we please walk!"

I kept encouraging him and telling him he could do it. We were almost there.

Just about that time, my boss, Rick Gunn drove by and honked his horn. This lifted Wylie's spirits. Rick turned around and pulled up alongside us like a pace car. This inspired Wylie for a few more feet.

At the 3.15 mile mark I offered to Wylie:

"Look Wylie. We've ran over 3 miles and I didn't think it was going to be so far a distance, do you want Pastor Rick to drive you the rest of the way to Starbucks?"

and, this is the money-line of my Thanksgiving....

"But, Mom, that would be cheating".

We pressed on.

Up and down two muddy hills. Through the washed out dirt road to Overcrest Drive.

Finally, we're moving downhill the last mile. He can see the freeway traffic and he knows the finish line is near. He picks up steam. My dad keeps him running. I dart out ahead so I can snap a picture of them finishing the race.

We turned the corner onto Hampton Rd and Wylie was just about to stop running when he hears shouts from the Starbucks parking lot....it's Tim, McKenna, Rick and our buddy Nick Crain...

"You can do it, Wylie! Woo Hoo! Keep going buddy!"

And, Wylie gives it all he has to the parking lot.

Man! IT was awesome. I love that kid.

What a fantastic way to begin this day of gratitude and thanksgiving.

After some high-fives, Wylie went immediately to the truck and got in. He was spent.

I bought my dad a coffee.

We drove back up to get the car from the city hall parking lot and returned to where the race had begun.

Wylie says

"Next year, we can add a few more runners".

You in???

Of Knights and Kings

2008-11-22T10:20:00.000-08:00

A typical Saturday morning finds McKenna reading or drawing and the boys playing a variety of video games. Lately, with my teaching schedule, I have taken to sleeping in a bit on Saturdays because it is the only day I can!

Consider my joyful surprise when I get up, shower, come downstairs and discover the boys hanging out in the music room (formally the chaotic space--see twitter feed for pics--), belly-down, engaged in an exciting game of: chess.

Once upon a time, a neighbor "boy" (who is now a grown man), Bob Ferguson, taught my kids to play chess. We have played periodically since as a family, but not for a very long time. So, the boys must have been inspired by something or someone to move their strategic minds and abilities into the music room. As I walked over to the board, Campbell was schooling Wylie on the particulars of the Knight's moves and both were plotting their strategies.

This one moment was worth the hours of work last weekend to re-make that space into something liveable again! Who knows what they might trip into next....dominoes? Checkers? Cards? Or, maybe they'll transition over to the instruments and improvise a great jam session? There's art supplies and books in the music room as well. Tim and I always wanted the music room to be "the place" to hang out in our house. (As opposed to the tv room). Today, we got a little bit more of our dream to come true.

Check-mate!

The Christmas List

2008-11-19T17:45:00.000-08:00

Lists: love 'em or hate 'em!

I'm a lover of lists.

Wylie has inherited this trait from me.

My lists revolve around verbs.

Wylie's lists revolve around nouns.

Clipped to our fridge (on top of previous important lists) is the Wise-man's Christmas list. Last count it had 35 items and climbing. Wylie always goes for the big ask.

And, he's not completely unaware of the challenging times we all find ourselves in economically speaking. Just the other day he passed by my office and remarked casually:

"Mom, holiday shopping is easier at Wal Mart" (having just heard that tag line on a commercial).

Now, lest you conclude my boy is overly materialistic and not centered on the true meaning of the season, I want to let you know he has made many other lists.

Here's a highlight roll:

"Holiday Risk Game Championship: Who Wants to Play" (Kenna's the only one signed up so far)

"Goosebumps episodes I like the best"

"Coming Soon: Friday Night Family Movie Night starring....." (with a list of movies)

"Thanksgiving Day race sign-ups" (yes, you can join that one--meet at City Hall at 8am to run the race with Wylie and me and a ragtag band of brothers...)

And, on the verbal list side, Wylie's current topic of interest is "created by:" names. That is, he can tell you who has created every cartoon and show he watches. He can cross-reference those creators if they have multiple shows and he can often tell you when the show/cartoon began.

Fascinating!

Quotable Wylie

2008-11-14T14:02:00.000-08:00

Drive home conversation, Friday, November 14th:

Campbell: Mom, did you know President-Elect Obama's initials are "B. O." (giggle)

Me: yep

Wylie: Campbell! Don't mock him. He is going to be the President you know...

*********

Wylie: Mom, if I was on a reality show like Endurance or Total Drama Island, would you vote for me?

*********

Wylie: What's with this long division!? I wish pencils had never been invented...

Sunday Night Quiet

2008-11-09T22:14:00.000-08:00

It's rare.

It's Sunday night, everyone is in bed (except me).

It's quiet (except for the soothing rhythm of the dishwasher).

I can still see and smell evidence of the activities of the afternoon and evening. Toys positioned on the ottoman mountain, papers fan across the sofa cushions, was that bacon earlier today?

It was cool enough outside and damp enough from the rain last night to have a fire. One cat still sits within range of the warm embers.

I have not been logging enough time on my own sofa lately. According to the media, most of the nation spends a good bit of time on the couch with the tv on. Not me. I'm an outlier. But, after this past six weeks I can honestly say: I love this spot!

It should not be so rare. I'm going to mark it in my calendar.

"November 16th: 9:30 pm Sit on Sofa Priority A (for you Franklin Covey types)"

Wylie is True Blue

2008-11-04T23:15:00.000-08:00

I was teaching tonight when this historic election was conceded. However, earlier in the day, Wylie (who has been very aware of all things political this election season) revealed the following:

"Mom, I'm really half red/half blue".

"What do you mean by that, Wylie"?

"Well, I like Obama and John McCain".

Little did he know that his statement was prophetic. We found out that red states turned half blue in sufficient numbers to elect Senator Obama.

What's wonderful?

In eight years, Wylie and Campbell will be able to vote for the next President.

In four years, McKenna will vote in her first Presidential Election.

What color will the country be?

Stay tuned...

Capital King: Update

2008-10-30T13:42:00.000-07:00

In a follow-up to a previous post about State Capitals...you should know: Wylie is the Capital King at Calimesa Elementary 5th grade. This is something he takes pride in and his teachers enjoy as well.

The Capital King did not stick his hands in the pumpkin guts, however...

Tuesday, Wylie and Campbell's classes were working with pumpkins on a science/math project. This involved carving, etc. When I arrived on-scene, Wylie was supervising his partner's work. Encouraging him from behind. But, there was no way his hands were reaching inside that thing.

So, Asperger peculiarities serve well in some areas, and restrict experiences in others. It's the ZigZag way.

Every Single Second

2008-10-27T22:56:00.000-07:00

Did you know there is something happening every single second?

That was the profound thought coming from Wylie today on the way home from school.

Think about it.

There is.

The planet is so huge to us--so vast. And, yet, if you've looked into the night sky and seen the millions of stars and planets that hang around just our neck of the galaxy, you understand Earth is really just speck.

In spite of our relative size, it does boggle the mind of a 5th grader that there is something happening every single second of every single day somewhere on Earth....

You know what that means?

God is up to something....He hasn't given up on us yet.

To Catch a Pirate

2008-10-25T10:46:00.000-07:00

Our childrens ministry program at Solid Ground Christian Fellowship is called "Treasure Island". We don't feel compelled to do everything "true to theme", but it is fun for most kids to play pirates once in a while.

Last night, we had an early Halloween (Alternative) party for the 4th - 6th graders. It was "pirate-themed". So, both boys wanted to dress up a bit. I found an old vest I had made out of a gaberdine black and grey stripe that worked quite well over a "puffy" shirt on Campbell. He added a belt as a scabbard for his sword, put a bandana on and--voila!--Captain Jaques Sparrow was ready. Wylie....not one to over dress for any occasion...wanted a bandana. And a hook. Said hook was "hand crafted" by a nice pirate wench named "Ruby" (me) out of aluminum foil. He wore a hoody and held onto the hook under the sleeve. Perfection.

We're on our way in the car to Morgan's house--she's a 4th grader in our program--and she is very energetic and enthusiastic always. She was particularly excited about the party. Wylie says outloud:

"I wonder which pirate Morgan will like better"?

Diplomatically, I respond:

"I think she'll like both pirates".

Very quickly Wylie interjected:

"But, I have a hook"!

So, there you have it me hearties, when it comes to pirates...a hook trumps haute couture any day.

Yo Ho Ho and a bottle of fun!

Where is Radiator Springs?

2008-10-21T15:36:00.000-07:00

In the deluge of political conversation, signs, headlines, culture, and spin my son Wylie absolutely nails the crux of most matters in an "off-the-record" conversation last night on the way home from swim.

We're headed down the Blvd., just past 7th and Wylie remarks (not for the fist time)

"I wish Yucaipa had more tall buildings".

"Why? What would go in the tall buildings" I ask innocently.

"More businesses and stores and stuff".

"But, we already have a lot of businesses and stores, right"?

"Besides, Mom, if we have more tall buildings, we'll be on the map. Only cities with lots of tall buildings get on the map. More people will come to visit us that way".

And, before I can continue the "managed vs. unfettered" growth dialogue, Wylie sums it all up with this zinger:

"Man, Yucaipa really is Radiator Springs"!

If you haven't seen the movie "Cars", this reference won't hold a lot of meaning for you. I'll recount the story...

A totally hip "new" race car named Lightening McQueen gets disoriented and lost in the middle of nowhere and finds himself crawling into a sleepy little town called Radiator Springs off of the main highway. On his way into town, he breaks a few laws and ends up behind bars and in need of some repairs. Not to mention, this little intersection of life is way off the radar and no one knows where Lightening is or what's happened to him.

For all its backwardness and lack, Radiator Springs really is a wonderful place where people matter and life is...simple. After Lightening gets to know the other cars there and experiences life outside the fast lane, he begins to see the place differently. His quest to get back to fame, fortune, big lights, bright cities is a bit derailed. In short, Lightening gets a chance to make a life "lane change". It's a really good story.

Intuitively, but certainly not intentionally, Wylie peers into the consciousness of the average voter on November 4th. The choices before Yucaipans (and many voters) is really about this one idea: where is Radiator Springs?

Building Trust

2008-10-19T22:15:00.000-07:00

Another Sunday is finished.

Wylie loves Sunday more than anyone in our home I think.

He loves church.

He loves our pastor.

He loves our gaming station in the kids ministry area.

He loves God.

He helps set up.

He sings during the worship videos.

He really thinks about the content.

Today, we were learning about what it takes to follow God. The verse was Psalm 25:4 which roughly translated says: "Show me your path so I can walk with You, Lord". We had the kids pair up and walk through an obstacle course--one blindfolded the other leading. Wylie was first to see the value in this exercise. He said to me (before we got started on the actual course):

"This is supposed to build trust, isn't it"?

Most of the other kids were just into the fun of the deal.

Not Wylie; he enjoyed the experience but he saw straight away the meaning behind the maze.

Because Wylie's fears and anxieties are larger than most his faith is larger than most. This creates a most unique relationship between him and God. It's an adventure to watch.

Frankfort or Dover?

2008-10-17T13:47:00.000-07:00

This month, the boys have been learning states' capitals like other 5th graders across the country. Campbell has been diligently studying 5 per day. We quiz each other periodically to prepare for the ultimate test on all 50. Campbell is a good student and he's doing great on the memorization. Every once in a while he blanks on the more obscure cities (Mt. Pelier anyone?--that would be Vermont).

Meanwhile, Wylie, kicks back in the big comfy chair with his feet up.

Why you ask?

Well, a couple years ago, geography and states' capitals were Wylie's CTI (courtesy of the Scrambed States of America). So, it's payback time now. I've written about this before in a couple different posts.

I must say, it is a bit satisfying for Wylie to "help" Campbell out on this one.

Thank You, City of Ember

2008-10-14T20:50:00.000-07:00

Ladies and Gentlemen of ZigZagStraight:

We have a CTI (current topic of interest) change!

The new CTI is: "City of Ember".

When we watched Beverly Hills Chihuahua (or however you spell it!), Wylie saw the preview for the new movie based on the book. This was one of Ken and Tim's favorite stories two summers ago when the whole family was on a "read aloud" together kick. Wylie listened in for most of the story, too.

When he saw the preview he was immediately consumed by one burning passion: find the book to read again and see the movie.

This is a beautiful thing.

Tonight, Wylie Harris did not immediately turn on the tv after swim practice. Wylie Harris did not immediately turn on his DS to play Mario Bros. Wylie Harris picked up a book and read 20 pages unprompted with a gleam in his eye. I do believe it is the glimmer.... of ....ember....

Pirates

2008-10-09T16:47:00.000-07:00

Pirate sightings in October are not that rare; however, on the 9th of October, it's a little early in the season. But, I declare I drove home with two pirates fresh from their first rehearsal of "Pirates: The Musical". They are beaming--I mean terrifying--pirates both!

As I pulled up to the curb to pick them up from school, Mrs. Thatcher (the chorus teacher) came over to the door to look me in the eye and say " I love these two boys". Every mom understands how those words make your heart sing. When the boys were babies we had them dedicated at church and my prayer over them then was simple: God, please make them brave men with kind hearts. I pray this over them every night. So, it is especially wonderful to see evidence of their kind hearts shining through. They both have already had several opportunities to display their bravery. I am proud of their character and courage.

The musical will debut late May. Book your tickets early...it will be standing room only with no hope for stow-a-ways!

Tenacious W.B.

2008-10-06T23:35:00.000-07:00

Tenacity is defined as holding fast: persistant, stubborn, adheisve or sticky. Well, if that doesn't describe Wylie when he has an idea on his mind....I don't know what does!

I've written before--and all Asperger families know--about current topics of interest. How persistent they are, how mind-numbing they can become for the audience. Yet, I'm inclined to see the flip-side of that coin tonight.

Wylie's tenacity creates a focus with laser precision. When he is "dialed-in" on something, there is a determination, a plan, a strategy, a marketing campaign, a plan "a", "b" all the way to "z". Think Ralphie in A Christmas Story...it's all about that Red Ryder Air Rifle with the compass in the stock and the thing which tells time!

There is something in this ability to focus that I absolutely admire/covet. Yes, it's annoying! Yes, it can get on my last nerve! But, what good has come and what potential will come from this ability to hold fast?

In my opinion, our culture does not hold fast to anything anymore. We are addicted to quick-fixes, fiber optics, wireless networking, and instant gratification. Just about the time you figure out what might be worth holding fast to, there' something new/better/different that steals our ADD souls.

Much time has been scattered in my life because of lack of focus. Oh, to have Wylie's tenacity for a month, a quarter, a year! Nevermind, Dancing With the Stars is On....

The Boring Part

2008-10-04T15:07:00.001-07:00

First of all, as I write this post it is absolutely delightful outside: a drizzly gentle rain is falling and it is less than 70 degrees outside. Oh, Fall--I've missed you! Welcome back!

Wylie and I were riding around town earlier today doing some errands for church and shopping for our weekly groceries. He enjoys time with me on these solo assignments. And, he talks my ear off.

So, after we were all done at Von's and we had picked up his favorite lunch, I asked him a question.

me: "So, Wylie, how is school going overall for you"?

wylie: "Good. Well, except it's kind of boring".

me: "What is the boring part"?

wylie: "The writing with the pencil part".

Kind of glad Ms. Peterson wasn't there to hear that answer...

The Cure

2008-10-01T22:58:00.000-07:00

This afternoon McKenna and I dropped by Barnes and Noble as a treat for her recent accomplishments in swim. While I waited for her to make her selection, I browsed titles in fiction and non-fiction. One of the face-outs on the aisle featured Jenny McCarthy's book about her son, Evan, who has autism.

Jenny is an advocate and has formed a advocacy group aimed at curing or healing kids from autism. Much has been written about the effects of dietary cleansing and detoxing with success in many cases. From my casual glimpses it looks like this book is really about the pursuit of a universal cure for autism.

It may seem strange, but as the parent of an Asperger child--admittedly not a fully autistic one--I have never considered "curing" Wylie of his condition. Since he is a twin and Campbell is "normal", I've never considered that exposure from immunizations or other toxins contributed to Wylie's situation. Therefore, I've never pursued remedies for this. I've been aware of other families and their tireless pursuit of doctors and programs seeking to treat or prescribe or medicate to improve the quality of life of their children. All of this is rational behavior and worthwhile. We've just never taken that step.

I think it's because Wylie has been learning all along to cope with his issues and he has made progress in every area he struggles. Since he learns, and progresses, and grows and responds it just seems natural to allow him to continue doing all that he does with his teacher, his RSP teacher, his speech pathologist, his Occupational Therapists, etc.

So, reading Jenny's book today it made me wonder: what if there was a "cure"? Would I want Wylie to be cured?

It seems the answer should be automatic.

But, it's not for me.

I cannot imagine Wylie any other way than how he is. He is incredibly insightful, deep-thinking, funny, charming, good-natured, honest, kind, different, and engaging. Do his differences cause him suffering that could be avoided if he was cured? Probably. So, I guess if I was ultimately concerned with minimizing his suffering, I would opt to cure him. But, if the absence of suffering meant the absence of some of Wylie's most unique and special qualities, the cure might be more harmful than the disease.

God Bless Willy Wonka!

2008-09-29T13:23:00.000-07:00

In the midst of all the bad economic news and puzzling prognosis for the financial sector, there is one silver-lining story I can share.

Wylie tried something new this weekend: a Wonka Bar.

Yes, that zany brainy chocolatier from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory inspired my new-taste-averse son to actually try a bite of chocolate.

(Fade to black): [camera zooms in on the nose of a ten year old boy sniffing an unwrapped Wonka Bar like a mouse sniffs a new piece of old cheese]

WYLIE: It smells wierd, do you think I will like it? It's melting in my hand!

MOM: Go ahead and bite it, Wylie!

WYLIE: (biting a millimeter of chocolate off with mouse-like motions) Hmmm. Well! It's not half bad!

Cue the Oompa-Loompas!

God Bless Willy Wonka!

Friday Round-Up

2008-09-26T13:16:00.000-07:00

This week saw me getting back into the professorial groove at CSUSB. Feels good. I love teaching; meeting the students for the first time is always very invigorating. All told (with all the courses I will be teaching at CSU and U of R this fall), I will get to know 150 more souls. Love it. Each soul = a story.

Meanwhile, Wylie and Campbell are happy that Saturday is "a do nothing day" in Wylie's parlance. They all do quite well with our pace of life and our activities with Solid Ground, YST, and school. However, Wylie especially relishes the random Saturday where there is nothing scheduled.

I have to tell you: so do I.

Quotable for Wednesday

2008-09-24T07:55:00.000-07:00

Campbell explaining what a "binder" is to Wylie:

Campbell: "You know, a binder. It's the thing that holds all your memories and stuff from school".

Wylie: "Well, how many memories do you have? Geesh!" (Campbell's binder is pretty big)

Watching Dancing With the Stars on Monday:

Me: "So, who are you voting for Wylie?" (me referring to which dance couple he liked this season)

Wylie: "Denise Hoyt" (she's running for city council here locally)

I'm sure there will be more election-related posts as Wylie is very dialed-in to the democratic process.

Back + Breast + Relay = DS

2008-09-22T09:10:00.000-07:00

Wylie has had a banner year.

Not only has he stared fear down in the face several times to do pretty amazing things, he has worked through "worst case scenarios" in many instances and persevered to grow through the circumstances and emerge a heartier soul.

I could not be more proud of him.

Saturday's meet was a mixed bag of results in terms of score-keeping: he made it through his 50 back, got DQed in the 100 breast for a late second hand on the first length, and swam his heart out on the free leg of the boys 4 x relay...only to have the team DQed on another swimmer's entry. Still, he navigated the maze of emotions.

He was jubilant after the 50 back; he got out of the pool and was very energized that he had done the race.

He was deeply disappointed when the ref came to tell him about the breast DQ--so much so that he could not even look him in the eye.

The relay was a last minute entry and Wylie was not "prepared" even to swim in it. Yet, it was just what the doctor ordered. Wylie was already saying "I'm never...." about future meets and wallowing in the agony of defeat. But, when he had to rally for the other boys on his team, he did it. And, he did it with great flare. I've never seen him swim as "hard" as he did that first 25 of the free. I think he took two breaths. At this point, none of the boys knew they were already DQed. It was very touching.

So, ZigZag readers know all about Wylie's quest earlier this month for the 200 items and the Nintendo DS. Well, I made a bargain with Wylie. He is the proud owner of his own DS and the newly committed YST swimmer who is going to attempt anything Coach Kathy thinks he is capable of in the season this year. I believe the bargain will serve him well.

I didn't stay involved in organized sports as a kid. There were a lot of complicated family dynamics, but mostly it was just that my interests were more artistic and creative and I ususally had my head in a book when I wasn't doing school stuff, etc. I did participate in a girls' service organization for 8 years and was active in other school clubs. Still, I played tennis, volleyball, and softball (just long enough to scar my knees permanently). I liked being part of a team. And, I learned perseverance in other areas of my life.

As a parent of a unique child like Wylie, the benefit of participation in swimming cannot be overstated. Learning to fail, learning to succeed, learning to support a team, learning to become better at something, attending practice when you don't feel like it, listening to direction, taking direction, persevering through disappointment, coming back to try again, cheering for other swimmers, feeling the pride of accomplishment when you achieve something you thought impossible...these things are all valuable for life. And, so, once again I am taken with the metaphor of sport as life.

Every race I watched on Saturday was inspiring. I almost tear up at everyone. It could be hormonal, I'll grant that. But, I think it's just the power of seeing courage on display. It moves me.

Wylie and Campbell and McKenna and all the swimmers are very courageous.

That's worth a few dollars in a bargain for the future.

First Meet of the Season

2008-09-19T23:46:00.000-07:00

Cross your fingers, say your prayers, will with all your might: Wylie swims in his first meet of the season Saturday morning. His events: 50 back and 100 breast. All we want is no DQ so he can begin his season with some new points toward his 100 point trophy.

In his prayers tonight he humbly asked: "God, please no end of the world" (code for "being disqualified").

It happens to all swimmers once in a while. It's happened to Wylie, Campbell, and McKenna. It's just that now, there's more on the line for Wylie because he understands what it means to improve. To make progress. And, he wants to get better now. He really didn't care before.

His coach is an angel. The team is pulling for him. I know you are, too.

Will report soon...

The Nose Knows

2008-09-18T17:23:00.001-07:00

Wylie's olfactory sense never ceases to amaze me!

The kid can smell a french fry (or other offensive odors) from a mile away or within a nanosecond of it hitting his nose.

Case-in-point: today, I snagged Ken from school and we picked up french fries and sodas for an after school snank en route to pick up the boys.

I said to Ken: "how long do you think it will take? less than 5 seconds before he says 'what's that smell' or something like it?"

Ken said she thought less than 5 seconds.

We hide the evidence.

He opens the door.

In less time than Phelps won the 100 fly, Wylie says:

"Why does it smell like french fries in here?"

It's like lightening.

His nose knows.

Sportsmanship

2008-09-16T19:26:00.000-07:00

The YST Swim Banquet was held in Park View Middle School's Fine Arts room last Saturday evening. It was a "Rewind to the 80's" Theme complete with a costme contest. Slash was there as were a few Madonna-look-a-likes.

Among the swimmers honored was none other than: Wylie Harris.

He received the Sportsmanship award for his age group from his coach, Kathy Fellenz.

She has coached Wylie for three years now. He is probably the oldest swimmer in her group and he has traditionally swam last in the lane (until recently...see archived posts from July).

But, last Saturday Coach Kathy and the entire coaching staff recognized Wylie for his character, his attitude, his persistence, and his courtesy toward other swimmers. He was presented a plaque along with his team trophy. The plaque joined his three other trophies from YST.

Now, these trophies used to sit on the trunk with all our downstairs "library" books and games behind the sofa. But, since Saturday's festivities these items are on proud display on the tray on our ottoman. I tried putting them back once already, to which he exclaimed:

"Mom! That's my trophy wall!"

I guess even Michael Phelps probably hasn't put away all those golds just yet...

Well done, Wylie!

The Latest Quotables from Wise Man

2008-09-14T23:36:00.000-07:00

Today, on hearing our dear friend, Mrs. Breann--who is competing for that 27 dresses title this year as bridesmaid to a zillion brides-- would not be at church because she was at a wedding...

"What? She's getting married!? What about Mr. Nick?" (Nick is Breann's husband)

At Frugos:

"Vanilla Custard is the best. It's low fat you know".

When asked what the best part of our YST swim banquet:

"The dancing. Do you want to see my move?"

(picture the Peanuts during the Christmas play rehearsal)

When asked who is favorite Peanuts character is:

"Snoopy, because he's a dog. And, he's quiet. He doesn't talk a lot and I don't talk a lot".

To which sister and I rolled our eyes....

Friday Night Lights

2008-09-12T21:18:00.001-07:00

We live just above the local highschool.

On Friday nights for home games, the "Y" on the foothills is lit up with...some kind of fire light. It's the ultimate in nostaligic experiences.

I was driving by the game tonight and saw the cheerleaders up on their boxes, the visiting team's band in the stands, heard the roar of the crowd...and if I blinked I was back at my own alma mater. It's such a universal American icon: the highschool football game.

Maybe the million dollar synthetic turf will do the trick this year for the Thunderbirds? It will take a few more Friday night lights to find out.

Last Call for ...

2008-09-10T16:24:00.000-07:00

Zig Zag Readers!

If, and only if, you want to help Wylie in his "item" quest...you can pick out something online. Here's the scoop:

go to www.gafundraising.com and click on the Online store tab bottom left. Key in the School organization code:

937672

When prompted, fill in Wylie Harris for first and last name!

It's items, not $ amount spent--so go for lots of cheap things! ,)

Thank you in advance for any holiday shopping you do this way. He is working diligently on the project and the deadline is Friday, September 12th.

We'll let you know how it turns out!

The Scrambled States of America

2008-09-09T21:51:00.000-07:00

We haven’t done any extensive traveling as a family. When it comes to vacations we’re more likely to blitz five or six crazy fun things into a three day weekend than strategically carry out a well-planned and trip-ticked three week holiday. Everything has been by car; in Southern California you can take in quite a bit in a two to three hour car drive! During these excursions, Wylie has always been keenly aware of our surroundings. He is quick to point out “Welcome to” city signs and he announces them with formality like a resident tourism official. Because of his awareness, I’ve always had the impression Wylie viewed our travel from a video game perspective—kind of like we were navigating a virtual reality map.

Last fall, we did take a trip that saw us extend our normal three hour adventure by a factor of five--passing through five states! I knew this would intrigue Wylie so on our semi-monthly trip to Barnes and Noble, I picked up a whimsical little book called The Scrambled States of America by Laurie Keller. (If you have children 12 or under this is a must have book for your child’s library!) My intentions were simple—I wanted to take advantage of the learning opportunities our trek would provide. I figured since Wylie was the most interested (of the three children) in the cities we passed through on smaller trips, he might naturally be the most interested in the geography of our western states. To say, now, that Wylie is interested in U.S. geography is like saying Picasso was interested in painting! Ms. Keller’s little book ignited a passion for geography in Wylie that quickly burned into an obsession!

We all have hobbies and interests—reading, music, golf, gardening and the like. Asperger folks don’t just have hobbies—they have obsessions or current topics of interest (CTI). Their interest can become dominant and almost all-consuming. Quite literally, these topics populate the person’s conversation, thought-life, dreams and reality. For Wylie, our United States, their capitals, nicknames, locations and other pertinent facts about them took over his conscious and subconscious thought! And, I must say, we all benefited.

The Scrambled States was rarely out of Wylie’s hands. The fresh, crisp corners of the bright green cover became dog-eared in record time. And, it served quite nicely as our map on the way to Colorado and back. Since that time, Wylie’s penchant for states’ trivia has become almost legendary. It is not uncommon for Campbell to brag on Wylie’s knowledge when introduced for the first time (a fact that reveals Campbell’s character while it compliments Wylie’s). And, on more than one occasion, an unsuspecting adult dinner guest has been sabotaged by the sly nine year old and his current topic of interest. Just last month, our family of five was enjoying dinner at our favorite Mexican restaurant and playing a little states’ trivia just for fun. Upon stumping us unilaterally Wylie asked:

“Do you find yourself saying ‘you gotta be kidding me?’”

Powell's Sweet Shoppe

2008-09-08T21:11:00.000-07:00

Someday Wylie will say "This is where it all began...."

We visited this store on our recent trip to La Jolla and Wylie was utterly captivated! You can visit their site for pictures and the backstory http://www.powellssweetshoppe.com/

Tim was also impressed. He asked for "Ice Cubes" which are little chocolate squares he remembered from his childhood. The clerk immediately took him to a basket full of this exact candy. Wylie said he wanted to take a picture of Powell's to put in his first Sweets 'N Go.

"You know, Dad, like they have in Famous Dave's BBQ...they have a picutre of Porky's in there..."

So, the next time you are in La Jolla (or the other Powell's locations) drop in and pick up a sweet something from your past. Oh, and for real nostalgia, they play Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory non-stop in the back of the store!

Sweet!

Three Weddings and a Race

2008-09-07T17:12:00.000-07:00

2000 swimmers come to La Jolla, CA every September for the annual Rough Water Swim.

Tim was numbered among them.

They come in all shapes and sizes, although most are pretty darn fit!

There were also other goings on...

We saw three different weddings: two in the Club House right above the Cove and one on the 5th floor terrace of the signature pink hotel just opposite the park. Beautiful weather all weekend although it was a bit on the sultry side with more humidity than normal.

McKenna and her swim friend, James, swam a half mile or so in the cove yesterday to warm up with Tim and Laurie (his swim friend!)

Campbell and Wylie enjoyed exploring the cove, too. It was just the two of them and several hundred other kids yesterday.

Wylie found a rock he liked and floated lazily looking at fish. Campbell raked in several beautiful shells including a petrified tooth from some kind of animal.

I like to think that Wylie will swim the mile at La Jolla some day. He is relatively fearless in the water and he loves the ocean. I'm sure I'll blog about it (or whatever the "thing" will be in three or four years) when he does do it.

Tim's group had a good showing in the race for their age groups. And, Trevor Hoyt from YST took 1st in the mile for his division!

Me? No way. I will keep to dry-land and watch with awe those who are more like fish than
Nemo and Dorie. Although, I like their motto: just keep swimming, just keep swimming....

Broken Arms and Warm Hearts

2008-09-05T08:57:00.000-07:00

Our very good friend (and neighbor) Camille fell off the swings at school yesterday and broke her wrist!

Ouch!

On the way home from school I let the boys know about Cami's accident. Wylie has always been kind of sweet on Camille. She is two years or so younger than the boys, but Wylie and she share a common love of....Chowder, Flapjack, Sponge Bob, and miniature toys.

So, as I broke the news, the very first thing Wylie said was "Can I help her, Mom?"

To his credit, Campbell is typically very chivalrous as well. But, Wylie was first to immediately show empathy and compassion. He truly wanted to do something to help her. I'm sure he'll have ample opportunities in the coming weeks.

In the meantime, Team Harris is off this afternoon to La Jolla for the annual Rough Water Swim for Tim. This is a highlight every year for us as a family. La Jolla is gorgeous! We stay at a hotel that is within walking distance from everything. It will be refreshing.

The Power of A Goal

2008-09-04T08:43:00.001-07:00

"This is your Goal" said my son last night.

He was holding onto a Nintendo DS about six inches in front of my face.

"You're doing great, but you have to get a few more items. Remember, Mom: this is what we're working for" (again with the thing in my face).

So, the saga of the 200 items continues. I thought we had done quite well (our home group was very generous), but Wylie knows the power of visualization I suspect.

He didn't want me to rest on my laurels (or anything else I can rest on!)

Wylie is--focused.

Asperger people as a whole are very focused people.

Believe me, the current topic of interest is the fund-raiser and the DS "we" can earn with enough items sold.

I know all kids get into these things, but Wylie's determination is exceptional. It will be interesting to see how it all turns out by next Friday.

One thing is certain: I know what the goal is.

Quotable from Wylie

2008-09-03T10:52:00.001-07:00

"Mom, I don't how I'm going to get married....I'm no ladies' man"

"My tooth is still under my pillow. I don't think the tooth fairy works holidays" (Labor Day)

"Man, I need to go to swimming. My pits stink, my whole body stinks! That's what you get: 5 weeks with no bathing"

After watching The Mummy with Dad: "I'm never going to Egypt".

"How many items did you sell today, Mom?"

200 items

2008-09-01T08:25:00.000-07:00

Every year in September it's the same refrain: Mom, I need to sell 200 items so I can get _____.

Yep: it's school fund-raiser time!

Wylie, more than Campbell or McKenna ever did, embraces the motivational energy of well-intentioned sales reps for various candy/treat/cheesy-gift companies. He becomes intoxicated with the idea of working for an elusive "something". In other words, he gets the fever.

Yesterday, Sunday, he brought the brochure to our church. Now, we are a portable church--we set up and tear down everything every week. This means, all the humans there in the morning are busy doing the set up and tear down, etc. Even if they have the heart to support the 200 item movement, they don't really have a chance to visit with him sincerely about it. After the first 15 minutes, Wylie came up to me with a predictable complaint:

"No one is buying any items. How will I get to 200 items?"

And, I tried to encourage him with a canned 'how to handle rejection it's a numbers-game' speech. This was of little comfort. Wylie does not think along those lines.

His solution?

"Mom, can I have a lemonade stand? Then I can sell lemonade and get the $ to buy 200 items".

Oi vei!

Local readers and friends of Wylie: help me out, please! Ask him if YOU can support his school fund-raiser. Either that or stock up on lemonade at the Harris Ranch...

A History-Making Day

2008-08-29T15:51:00.000-07:00

Yes, Friday August 29th is a history-making day.

Because Sarah Palin, Governor of Alaska, has been chosen as McCain's VP running mate?

No.

Because it's John McCain's 72nd birthday?

No.

Because Wylie said to me in the car on the way home from school in a very casual way

"By the way, Mom, I tried a donut roll today in class".

(Me, trying very hard not to crash the truck)

"You ate something new today?"

Wylie:

"Yeah, you know it's like a donut except really small like a ball. A donut roll". (Donut conoisseurs might call it a donut hole).

Me:

"And, you liked it?"

Wylie:

"Yeah. It was pretty good".

Ladies and Gentlemen of ZigZagStraight , it is truly a day for the history books!

Wylie Wonka

2008-08-27T21:22:00.000-07:00

What do you want to be when you grow up?

The question we all have been asked (and are still asking in some cases...)

Wylie's response used to be very predictable: he wanted to work at McDonald's of course! Even when his interest in video games and computers took off and we painted visions of engineering or when he became fascinated with the stars and planets and we spoke of teaching or becoming a scientist--he was undaunted. He would work at McDonald's. Because he loves McDonald's. There was no other possibility for him.

Until three weeks ago.

Ask Wylie what he is going to do when he grows up? He'll tell you plainly: he is going to open up a candy shop. But, it's candy that is healthy and good for you. It will be called "Sweets 'n Go". (He especially likes the "'n Go" part of the name).

He already has his first location scouted-out. When we were driving through the lovely streets of Corona Del Mar, Wylie remarked that it looked an awful lot like La Jolla (another favorite spot of ours). And, then he said "This looks like a good spot for my store. I'll open my first one here". The boy has great business instincts.

So, finally something has captured the imagination of the McDonald's devotee; I have no doubt Wylie can guide the devlopment of a treat so special it could deliver nutrition as ably as it tickled the tastebud. If such a treat passed Wylie's taste-test, any child/adult would love it!

Venture capitalists? Send your checks c/o Wylie's Sweet 'N Go. We'll put them in the money jar next to his sign up list for the Annual Christmas Risk Game. What have you got to lose?

My 10K and Wylie's Lane

2008-08-26T21:00:00.000-07:00

I guess it's fair to say I enjoy sport metaphors.

I have been training to run my first 10k this Sunday (before church!) In preparation, I have been running distances averaging 4 miles or so 4 days out of 7 the last four weeks.

Yesterday, in spite of a poor night's sleep, I decided to run a full 6.6 miles. I thought about the course on the way to the boys' school, I mentally rehearsed the run in my mind and imagined myself finishing the run in good stride and at my goal pace.

No surprise, the run happened as I "saw it". This was incredibly empowering and makes me really look forward to the actual race on Sunday!

Later that night at swim practice, Wylie's coach comes up to me and says "Guess who was leading the lane tonight?"

Now, Wylie has been swimming for three years..essentially doing his own thing without bothering other swimmers. His coach loves him and the team, to its credit, accepts him as he is. In this time, however, Wylie has never led the lane. Until Monday night.

We were getting ready for practice this afternoon and I casually said to Wylie: "You going to lead your lane again?" And, he didn't reply--that I heard. But, as I watched in awe, there he was again leading.

What clicked?

I asked him after he got out of the pool this evening. You know what he said?

"You said I could lead again".

Let that one marinate for a while.

Our words and thoughts are truly containers for power. We can run a strong 6.6 miles and we can swim our bodies faster than we ever have before--simply because we think and imagine we can.

Who knows what else Wylie, and I, and you can do???

Regular Ed

2008-08-25T13:14:00.000-07:00

It’s the end of Wylie’s 2nd grade year. I’m at his annual Individualized Educational Program meeting (IEP--a subject which deserves its own book). He has been evaluated by all of the teachers involved in his care this year and by a school psychologist. Around the table, his teacher, the principal, the speech pathologist…everyone involved on Wylie’s team were all unanimous in their view that Wylie was ready to transition to a regular classroom with resource support. (The arch angel Laurel O’Brien referenced earlier had recommended “main-streaming” Wylie for reading, science, math, and art. Even though Wylie struggled a bit, Laurel was confident that Wylie would thrive best if he were challenged. And, more important to her was the social and behavioral modeling he would be exposed to with regular kids). Heads are nodding in agreement. My chest is tightening. I take a deep breath. It seems like I should say something. The silence is deafening.

“Who would be his teacher?”

That’s all I can think of to say. I mean, I have had angels from on high teaching my son and he has done marvelously well. I realize he has been, in a sense, an able fish in a less-able pond. But, does it really have to be the case that in order for us to know how well he can swim, we’ve got to throw him to the sharks? I want to believe what this team is saying. I want to believe, in particular, the findings of the psychologist, Mr. Smith, that Wylie is a bright boy capable of much more than he has demonstrated. At the same time, I have for weeks been noticing that just when I think to myself, “Wylie is really very normal and I tend to exaggerate his eccentricities”—he proves me wrong! Do I really want to place him in an environment that will only serve to underscore his uniqueness? Where regular kids will be? Regular kids who have not been around “special” kids and may naturally think my son is…strange or a “weirdo” as he has sometimes been called?

“Mrs. Kryzmarczik. She has a very sweet class”.

I had recently heard of Mrs. Kryzmarczik from another teacher-friend of mine. For whatever reason, hearing her name again assured me this was going to be o.k. We moved him. This IEP took place in March. In between state testing, spring break, and Memorial Day, Wylie really didn’t have much of a chance to acclimate or learn. But, Joyce Kryzmarczik was warm and welcoming and the children were very sweet. She safely walked Wylie to the banks of the regular education stream. However, Wylie basically got to stick his toe in the water. He wouldn’t dive in fully until 3rd grade.

Ready, set, dive!

The water was deeper than we thought. After holding our breath for what seemed like an eternity, we came up for air and landed in Mrs. Smith’s class. Patti Smith. Yes, that would be Patti Smith married to Mr. Smith…the very same psychologist who evaluated Wylie and thought highly of his potential. It was our extreme good fortune to have Wylie placed with her for she understood him almost immediately. She was kind, intuitive, patient and committed to helping him swim with the school of fish she led. And, best of all, she appreciated Wylie’s sense of humor. With longsuffering she endured his ramblings on his current topic of interest (CTI)! Not only that, but Patti’s style of teaching embraced the whole child; what I mean by this is she believed all of the experiences of a 3rd grader could teach them something. In her view, our family vacations were just as much a part of the fabric of Wylie’s learning as her assignment. My perception of her approach to learning was that it was relaxed; this is not to imply anything sub-standard--far from it. Instead, Mrs. Smith had the rare gift of making multiplication facts, spelling, history, and writing as easy and appealing as…well, 1-2-3! In short, she was the perfect person for this part of Wylie’s adventure--the perfect swim coach. Even when the water was cold and deep and it seemed like Wylie would more likely sink than stay afloat, I trusted her completely. And, trust is so important when learning to swim, don’t you agree?

Corona Del Mar

2008-08-24T15:03:00.000-07:00

Corona Del Lovely.

Team Harris had a wonderful day at Corona Del Mar yesterday. Tim swam the annual open water in the cove there and the kids enjoyed the sand and surf. Me, just the sand.

Wylie was in the water the entire time. He loves jumping the waves and he tried boogie boarding yesterday for the first time. Dad says he was fearless!

I got in a quick run on Ocean Blvd just above the cove before the race got underway. In the glow of the Olympics there were several really decent beach volleyball games going on behind us and plenty of families enjoying the lazy day.

One of those days that captures all the best of what summer is about.

Ode to the Olympics

2008-08-22T09:02:00.000-07:00

My boys will miss them.

Especially Wylie.

Campbell has paid attention to every sport and has really liked the track and field events and swim the most.

Wylie has enjoyed all the events, but I think he is the most swept up in the pageantry of it all. He likes the Gold Medal Moments that NBC does on the pre-show. He loves all the Olympic trivia. And, he is a particular fan of our National Anthem when it is played at the medal ceremonies.

He stands (every time) with his hand over his heart while it is played. He even said a few nights ago:

"Man, I worship this song".

These days that might not be politically correct, but I know what he means. It was an appropriate use of the word worship.

Wylie is proud of the athletes, proud of America, proud of our flag, proud of our country, loves God, loves people, loves seeing winners celebrated, and all of this in spite of the fact that none of these things are taught any more in school (because they cannot be legally or because curriculum committees believe they know what is best).

So, here's to the Olympics! For all the great drama, competition, thrills, spills, and triumph of human spirit. And, for being one of the only places humans can still wave the flags of their countries with pride.

As it should be.

What Don't You Understand?

2008-08-21T08:51:00.000-07:00

Day 4 of back to school:

5th grade math picks up where 4th grade math left off (theoretically).
The lazy days of summer rot the math quadrants of the brain I think.
We are easing into division with an introduction of some guidelines (aka "cheatcodes") for what numbers are divisible by 2,3,4,5,6,9,10.

There are a handful of rules you can use to figure out if a larger number is divisible by any of these numbers. For example, if the sum of the digits is divisible by 3, then the number itself is divisible by 3. Test yourself: is 102,405 divisible by 3?*

Anyway, it is often the case that Wylie's mind interprets directions literally. This is particularly the case with verbal instruction. The last two days have had assignments with the guidelines written down. And, I have tried to reinforce those guidelines verbally.

This was met with "I don't understand" to which I replied

"What don't you understand?"

And, now I'm asking you: what kind of question is that? I mean, if you don't understand something how can you explain what you don't understand? This is the kind of brain cramp we run into with learning new concepts. Now, by the end of the second day's assignment, with me reading each guideline and asking him "what is the sum of the digits, is that number divisible by 3, then write down 3...." Wylie caught on by doing the problems. He understood the guideline by doing the work.

This is just an ordinary day in the life of a 5th grade teacher, I know.

But, as usual, these experiences hold more meaning for me. ...

Sometimes, grown-ups wrestle with problems over and over again. And, to some extent if you are honest, there are "guidelines" or cheatcodes available to us (counseling, wisdom of elders, the Bible, etc). And, yet we cry out many times in frustration "I don't understand"!

My sense is that--just like Wylie had to learn by doing--we have to follow the instructions we are given step-by-step and keep failing forward to begin to understand.

What don't you understand today?

*yes

When Vanilla Custard is Pina Colada

2008-08-19T15:40:00.000-07:00

We have this delightful little frozen yogurt place, Frugos, in Yucaipa. It has been a family favorite for a few months now. Even Wylie likes it!

Well, he likes one particular flavor: Vanilla Custard.

Now, this is the type of place where you walk up and "serve" yourself. They rotate the flavors often and there's about 8 flavors in all. They have dry-erase signs above each station so that you know what you are dispensing.

So, last night, as a "back to school" treat, we went to Frugos at Wylie's request. What happened at the check-out transpired in about 20 seconds, but you know how time slows down in a crisis. I'm paying for our yogurts and I overhear a conversation beside me that goes something like...

"Dude, you said you had pina colada"

"Yeah, it's in the middle where it usually is"

"Dude, the sign says Vanilla"

(and this is the station from which Wylie innocently dispensed his yogurt).

Dude goes in the back and I'm beginning to process what has happened. Just as Wylie sticks his spoon in his mouth I dip my finger in his cup and quickly give it a lick: pina colada.

Now, if you have normal taste-buds that might throw you a bit, right? But, let's pretend you have super-normal taste-buds...and that tastes and smells are extremely significant to you (reference What's in a Nugget from July posts). I look at Wylie just as he is gagging and trying not to throw-up right there in the middle of Frugos.

He immediately dumps the whole $4 cup in the trash and with red-rimmed eyes says

"What's up with the vanilla?"

as I see Dude writing the correct label on the station sign.

Tragedy. Of epic proportions.

Maybe, just maybe, Frugo's can recover from this mistake.

Until then, no "vanilla" will pass Wylie's lips until it's been on mine first...

Buttons

2008-08-18T08:59:00.001-07:00

Back to school today!

The Harris Ranch was awake, alert, and enthusiastic much earlier than normal today. I was done with my run at 6:30 am--phew!

The kids had all laid out their clothing last night. Actually, Campbell and McKenna started and then Wylie followed suit. That's when he noticed:

"Mom, these new shirts all have buttons!"

Now, he was with me when we bought the new shirts, but I guess it did not register with him at the time. Wylie is still very particular about collars and shirts and buttons. Regular crew neck t-shirts are pretty much all he wears. And, even these will get a thumbs-down if the neck is "too loose". All fairly typical stuff for sensory kids.

We managed to coax him into the shirt. It's blue with a very cool Dickey's logo on the side. Everyone compliments how cool he looks. Patiently, Wylie buttons up every button. All the way to the top. I ask him:

"Are you sure you don't want to leave the top button undone? It's more comfortable".

Wylie:

"I am comfortable".

So, he will no doubt be one of only a few 5th graders today all across America with a blue, Dickey polo shirt buttoned all the way to the top.

Viva la difference....

On Saddleback's Presidential Forum

2008-08-16T19:34:00.000-07:00

I am happily in awe of the post-forum "buzz" in the media about Rick Warren's conversation format with our two presidential candidates. It appears (although I'm sure there will be detractors) that this "novel" approach was very well received with CNN and their panel of experts.

Both men were as genuine and authentic (as any political candidate can be). The relaxed--and decidedly 'non-debate'--format catered to more realistic dialogue. The kind you and I might have at Starbucks over coffee. The kind most Americans would rather hear, in my opinion.

We all are so blessed with the freedom of choice; both of these men have good intentions. The "how" is different. But, people have been disagreeing about the "how" of societies ever since societies formed.

Rick Warren has opened a door that we all should respectfully walk through: genuine, authentic, conversation about our simillarities and differences. Well done.

It Takes a Team

2008-08-15T15:05:00.000-07:00

It appears everyone is waxing rhapsodic about the Olympic performances. But, we can indulge when it only happens every two years, right!

Lately, I've been thinking about the sports where there is an individual as well as a team component. For example, gymnastics and swimming. In men's gymnastics, the USA didn't have the goods individually to medal in the All-Around competition. Yet, those same gymnasts performed as a team to take the Bronze. Their individual performances combined to out-perform the other teams.

In men's swimming, the converse of the above is true: Michael Phelps does have what it takes to out-swim everyone in the field, yet he also participates in the relay teams where, regardless of his own physical strengths, the team will win or lose based on their combined efforts. He swims in those relays for the team.

I'm wondering...which victory is sweeter?

If Phelps was swimming alone with just the clock--no crowd, no team mates, no journalists--would his accomplishments be as meaningful to him? (Probably so in his case)! One could argue that even in the absence of all the noise, Phelps' mom is his team every event! But, the point I'm trying to make is that the team animates the dream. The team makes it real. The team validates the experience. When Soni took the Gold in the breast stroke last night, it was her team that shouted the loudest praise and it was to her team she looked first (after she saw the time)!

So much of what we do as human beings we do alone. I think of Wylie. It's Wylie that sits in his chair at school trying to make his pencil write letters that somehow conform to what we recognize. It was Wylie up on top of that platform 25 feet high getting harnessed to push himself off down the zipline. No one could do it for him. Most of the hard work of these athletes (gymnasts and swimmers alike) is done alone. Work out after work out.

Yet, at the same time, much of what we do as human beings we do as a team. We cheer one another on to victory. We shout warnings when there is danger, we pick up and embrace the wounded. We lead others by our example. It is the promise of the shared victory that creates energy for us to do what we have to do alone. We strive for our personal best to support the team's best.

I guess at the end of the day, what I hope for is this: in Wylie's life...even when he's alone...I want to him to know...we're his team. Everyone should have a team. Everyone should be inspired to give more in what they have to do alone in order to advance what we all do as a team.

And, I think that's why we're all so enthralled with the Olympics.

We believe in the team. We are the team.

At the risk of sounding a lot like the Visa commercials lately...Go World.

Proud to Be the Official Sponsor

2008-08-14T11:13:00.000-07:00

Marketing works!

Last night, after our small group wrapped-up, Wylie asks if he can drink a Coke. It's 9 o'clock. No "good" parent allows a child to drink a soda that late. But, it's summer...we've been watching the Olympics at night...

Sensing my reluctance, Wylie says quite convincingly:

"Besides, Mom, Coca-Cola is proud to be the official sponsor of the 29th Olympiad"!

Score one for the advertisers and marketers of the world!

Venti

2008-08-13T11:22:00.000-07:00

20 years of marriage.

Something to be celebrated no matter who you are, where you live, what you believe.

One of the reasons Wylie has lived such an amazing and wonderful life (so far) is because of the love, the strength, the wisdom, the courage, and the example of his father. My husband.

There is more history and "knowing" in one glance between us than an entire volume of the encyclopedia. You can't buy that, exchange it, fake it, fabricate it, or forget it.

On this ZigZag adventure, there is no question in my mind who has kept me, the family, and our ultimate course "straight"....

Here's to another venti!

Back to School Boogie

2008-08-12T13:07:00.000-07:00

Our kids go back to school on August 18th.

Everyone has been asking the same question: was this a really short summer?

I think so.

Wylie asked me last night how I felt about having two 5th grade boys now.

I feel pretty good about it.

This week is the back to school dance...

inventory shoes/socks/underwear
dig out a path to bedrooms and restore order from summer chaos
begin going to bed earlier to wake up earlier
venture out for school supplies and a new shoe or two
prepare for schedules to sink-in

What do you do to prepare the kids and the family to go back to school?

Lessons from the Men's 4 x 100 Relay

2008-08-11T15:42:00.000-07:00

Sports enthusiast or not...you have to love the victory from last night's 4 x 100 men's relay!

I just re-watched it and had goosebumps and was near tears the entire time. There are practically no words to describe the moment the team sees the #1 time on the board. But, who needs words when you have Phelps' face?

That pure, raw, energy of emotion could fuel an entire city! (Well, at least a house or two).

Here's what I learned from that race:

the past does not always predict the present (they had suffered defeat in the previous two games)
those most likely to win statistically can still lose
actions trump words
sometimes being the underdog makes the victory sweeter
team victories are multiplied in power over individual victories

Much will be written about that race for years to come; the athletes will never forget their performance or the feeling of the win. But, only here at zigzag will the race be viewed as a metaphor for those living with Asperger Syndrome and autism. Here's why:

the past does not always predict the present or the future (children with Asperger and Autism can overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles)
those most likely to "not" succeed... can
actions trumps diagnoses
sometimes being an underdog makes the victory sweeter
team victories are mulitplied in power over individual victories (and every individual victory is a team win when your child is influenced by special educators, speech and language pathologists, resource specialists, occupational therapists, community members, church members, friends, and family!)

Our family will continue to watch the Olympics and cheer every awe-inspiring performance. We may not be able to anchor a Gold-medal-winning relay team, but we can do the best with what we have been given and turn in the performance of our lives with our lives.